It's a white trash world....
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Posted:Feb 4, 2020 4:20 pm
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2020 5:59 pm
10440 Views
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And it call be all summed up in one photo.
I came home from work today hoping that the handyman was able to put my bathroom back together while I was at work.
We all know I'm not feeling 100% and the last thing I want to do is spend another night looking at the half-assed unskilled attempt at updating my bathroom that's been happening.
I didn't think it could look worse....
Yet, knowing this is the FINISHED outcome of his handiwork is way worse than I could have ever imagined.
Is this for real? What the fuck is that?? A piece of wall trim???
I have oficially experienced the Walmart version of carpentry. My eyes hurt from looking at this.
Did you happen to notice it's sitting on a tilt??
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25
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It hit me like a ton of bricks.
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Posted:Feb 4, 2020 1:34 am
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2020 5:59 am
11379 Views
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It's official, yesterday's laryngitis has developed into full-on cold.
It comes complete with eyes that won't stop watering, runny nose, and sore throat.
Fantastic!!
I can't wait until I go to the Business to Business meeting today where everyone is going to avoid me like I just stepped off the plane from China with the Coronavirus.
I'm sure a portion of my body aches and pains are a result of this.... But I also know a good portion of them are from the elliptical machine last night when I thought I was going to collapse and die 15 minutes into my 30 minute cycle.
I know now that part of that was because I was probably already starting to feel run down and ill but didn't realize it as I'm sure it progressed over the course of the entire day slowly enough that it was unnoticeable.
Thankfully I have an office that I can sequester myself in the good majority of the day....
Thankfully I have decent cold medication that seems to be helping me already this morning....
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17
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Speak up, I can't hear you.
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Posted:Feb 3, 2020 2:50 pm
Last Updated:Feb 4, 2020 11:15 pm
9894 Views
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I have completely lost voice.
How did this happen?
I'm not sick, I don't have a sore throat, and I haven't been yelling like a mad woman at a rock concert.
It's a complete mystery.
The coworkers have been capitalizing on my delimma.... Apparently it's funny when I start laughing and noises never before heard in nature emit from my body. Or, better yet, how hilarious is it phone continuously throughout the day hear squeak a barely audible 'hello'.
I work with the criminally insane, swear God.
other news.... Nose Hairs has recently started lecturing on the necessity of a house. He's gone so far as show LISTINGS of homes for near him.
What is going on here?!?
Does he not realize what it's like be a single mom? are a sponge bleeding dry...
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13
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Does a long term relationship ruin you for all other relationships?
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Posted:Feb 2, 2020 11:43 am
Last Updated:Feb 4, 2020 1:35 am
11451 Views
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I have wondered this many, many times.
I often find myself doing the comparison game. Having been with my ex-husband years, there was a lot that I could compare a potential mate to.
Not in physical appearance....
But, in how he was as a person. How did this new man treat other people? How did he treat me? What were his goals and aspirations? What were his hobbies? Do I want to be with this potential mate the way I had wanted to be with ex-husband?
Even after having been divorced now 9 years... I still look those similarites.
I know this is wrong... I know it with every fiber of being as I know there will never be another person who embodies all those qualities, minus the drinking problems and arrogance.
So, the time has come that I change this way of thinking.
What exactly is it that I'm looking ?
I'm looking a shower partner. Someone to soap me up and wash hair, someone who will let me do the same him. I'm looking someone who will undress me at night and want to sleep naked, someone who won't be grumpy with me when I wrap arms around him at night, or caress his hand when he rests his arm on side. I'm looking someone who can understand sarcastic personality and will watch scary movies with me so we can pick apart the plot and grumble at the dialogue. I'm looking someone who will be patient with me as I know I have bad days, and I struggle with anxiety, and I'm working on becoming a better version of myself.
I think maybe if I focus on what it is I need, and less on what I had, it will get easier me to be happy with what I may have.
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20
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The 21 Day New Routine Challenge - Day 3
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Posted:Feb 1, 2020 5:31 pm
Last Updated:Feb 2, 2020 11:39 pm
10148 Views
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thighs are finally a little tender from the eliptical, so I didn't plan on doing more than machine today.
Knowing I wasn't going to be there more than a half hour, I waited 7 o'clock head in assuming the place would be dead.
It's 7pm on a Saturday?!?
All the cool people are having fun, on dates, or spending time at home with the fam.
As usual, wrong.
I walked in and immediately saw 2 of more in-shape coworkers lifting weights on a machine in the corner.
Trying be incognito, I turned back them as I took off street shoes put on gym shoes.
"Hey, fancy seeing you !"
A voice yelled from the corner where coworkers were.
"! Guess THIS is where the cool are hanging tonight!"
I yelled back, laughing a hair. Both coworkers were now walking toward , I was feeling completely of place.
"Kinda cool, we never get see you outside work. What's your routine?"
"No routine, I just started coming. This is third day, still kinda trying figure it all ."
What I thought was going be a horrible and embarassing experience, turned be pretty beneficial. I'm thankful I ran into them, . I learned a lot.
I hadn't planned on stopping, but I ended up hitting Wally-world on way home after the gym. I knew I would be of toilet paper by morning and knew I woudn't want to venture then, either.
No make-up, hair in a sweaty pony tail, and clad in athletic wear.... I felt a little overdressed.
It was a banner night at the ole Walmart. The thing missing was a screaming in an unattended shopping cart.
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10
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Office Bingo
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Posted:Feb 1, 2020 9:32 am
Last Updated:Feb 3, 2020 3:53 am
9966 Views
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I have found quite literally the BEST calendar I have ever seen.
In just one week I managed cover most of these squares!
Printer out of toner - Emailed Lexmark support as the printer in my office needed the toner replaced. This is supposed to be an auto ship deal.... We should never run out of toner.
Have you tried turning it off? - Talked to 3 people who barely spoke English from IT support who each started the conversation with "Have you tried turning it off?"
Leaves work early - Boss #1 and #2 every day this wee
It's too cold - The office irritant. She only complains about the obvious that is already on everybody's mind.
Printer Jam - Every time a moron who doesn't know their ass from their elbow uses my printer.
Boss laughs at own joke - Yesterday, when he asked me if he told me the story about Mr. Potts. It wasn't not funny. We then proceeded to talk about how squids have beaks and there are lizards that have their tail fall off when you touch it.
It's too hot - This time it was me. I felt like my desk was sitting on the surface of the sun.
Spilled drink - In the breakroom. Cart Tard spilled his water and didn't bother to clean it up. Disgusto....
Rotten food in fridge - Always?! There is never a moment when there is not.
Vulgar language - Um, yah. Me again. I could have been a sailor. Pretty much every conversation I have with Nose Hairs, my work BFF, or Meme Guy.
Singing voices - One of the leaders had a birthday on Thursday. Everyone sang happy birthday to him while he was on brea
Surprise meeting - Every time Boss #1 says "have you got a minute?"
Receive a personal call - again. Got a call from my on Friday tell about her self proclaimed crisis. Her earring fell in the sink at her dad's and she could see it. Good lord...
Email from the boss - Yah, like, 9 million a day. Then he asks me 3 days later "didn't you read the email I sent?" Which one...
Office romance rumor - Meme Guy got a flower delivery on Wednesday. They were beautiful and we were all jealous. Even Boss #1 asked me about them on Friday. (Because, I always have the scoop.)
Email won't send - Ha ha ha... that one makes me laugh. Half the time I can't get my email even come up.
Called the wrong name - Witnessed a coworker call a guy Mark 3 different times. His name is Mike.
Office whispers - I revealed Nose Hairs that Boss #1 put in his retirement notice. Only 4 of us know his official last date of wor
I can't WAIT see how long it takes complete the February board!
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10
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The Office Asshole
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Posted:Jan 31, 2020 1:57 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2020 1:43 pm
9755 Views
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You know him....
Every office has that guy.
The perpetual negative dink who sits in the peanut gallery and puts his 2 cents in everywhere he isn't wanted.
It's like he is ALWAYS hovering in the shadows just WAITING for his opportunity to strike.
We transitioned to a new operating system on our computers when the switch out happened earlier this week which has the employees in an uproar.
"How do I log in??"
"Why do they change things???"
"I was just getting to know the old system????"
My job has been a nightmare the last couple of days as everyone has been coming straight to me for help.
Yesterday was no exception.
I was standing in the office across the hall from mine talking to Office Asshole and my Work BFF when a coworker came frantically to the door and said to me "I hate to keep bugging you, but I need help logging in."
Office Asshole snapped into action.
"There's a job guide back there, did you look at it? Perhaps you need to go get with [manager] and have him go over it with you."
His voice was hostile and sarcastic.
While I was frustrated at the fact that this stuff is consuming so much of my time, I also felt embarrassed at the way he was treated. Then again, I was a little surprised Office Asshole was trying to redirect this guy because he knew how frustrating it was becoming for me.
In the end, I helped my coworker and apologized for his treatment but explained to him that while it wasn't conveyed very well, the message was accurate. We do have job guides that walk you through step by step the entire process and they need to be utilized before coming to me.
Unrelated Side Note: The apartment manager called me yesterday to let me know they are installing a new medicine cabinet and mirror thing in my bathroom today?? I'm not quite sure what to expect.... Let's just hope it doesn't look all janky and crooked as this handyman is pretty terrible.
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15
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How long is too long?
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Posted:Jan 30, 2020 2:21 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2020 9:43 am
9579 Views
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The lava lamp in my living room has been on for..... Good lord, knows how long now.
Long enough that the colored wax is one solid mass that slowly moves from top to bottom in one, endless rotation.
Time to shut that thing off before it becomes a safety hazard!
I sit here and wonder, this morning, how much of what I do is because I want to do it and how much of what I do is of habit.
I'm going to venture to guess the majority of it is of habit.....
Routine...
I feel apprehensive today as I'm going to be breaking my after work routine. My meal-prepping work friend and his girlfriend have invited me to try out their gym today as I'm considering a membership but want to check it out before I make the commitment.
I'm not new to the gym thing.... I'd done it for years in the past.
The problem is, it's no longer my routine. My anxiety is on high alert. Every part of my being is saying...
Stick to your routine!
Wish me luck.
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21
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Public Restroom Hell
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Posted:Jan 29, 2020 10:15 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2020 2:33 am
16605 Views
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When you work with the public, there’s no other option….
Eventually you’re going HAVE use the public restroom.
Words cannot convey just how much I hate using our restrooms. A part of fully believes this is the place where people come die.
Suffering from explosive diarrhea and ready deliver a shit show?? Here’s the place for you!! Creating a stench that will curl your nose hairs and burn your eyes on the agenda for today?? You’re in the right spot!! Need a contained area to let your destroy while you on your phone in the stall?? Go no further!!
I was in the restroom this morning quickly trying get the heck out of there as a white trash mom was in the next stall, her crawling all over the floor. Before I knew what was happening, a head popped under the stall wall and a tiny little face was staring right at .
“Mom, there is a lady peeing over here too.”
“Finley, get the hell over here. She don’t need you over there. I’m sorry Ma’am.”
What the hell am I supposed to say??? The is still staring at .
“She isn’t sitting on the toilet mom. You yell at when I do that.”
“Finley Marie, get your ass back over here before I bust it!”
White trash mom is getting angry. Her phone rings and she answers it.
Really?!?
Finally, I said something Finley.
“Finley, I need do some private stuff, so you’ll need pop back onto mom’s side, ok?”
“O”
She smiled at and disappeared under the wall. White trash mom was yelling at whoever was on the other end of the phone, pretty sure it was white trash dad who is no longer in the picture.
I couldn’t wash my hands fast enough get the hell out of there.
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39
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(Page:)
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Perception
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Posted:Jan 28, 2020 3:52 pm
Last Updated:Mar 7, 2020 7:03 pm
9697 Views
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It's all in the point of view....
I often look at myself in the mirror and feel disgusted.
Today was no exception...
I curled my hair for a change and realized just how much grey hair I'm starting to accumulate. Part of me wanted to cry when I noticed I now have a few regulars in my bangs....
Just one more thing to add to the list of my flaws.
Frizzy hair, oily skin, dark circles under my eyes, can't tan, overweight.....
I stand before the mirror and pick myself apart every single day.
Which means I start my day, every day, feeling unworthy and defeated.
Here's the thing, though....
When I emerged from the bathroom after brushing my teeth my said to me "You're hair looks pretty, mom."
And, she genuinely meant it.
When I got to work, every coworker I passed smiled and said Hi to me. One of them told me she'd made cookies and had put one on my desk for me so I would get one before they were gone.
She was so excited to share a cookie with me.
When I went to leave for the day, my ex-husband and were waiting outside my office. He decided to drop her off today so I wouldn't have to drive out of my way to go get her.
He does this a couple of days a week.... He drives out of his way to drop her off so I don't have to.
Which brings me to my point.
It's all a matter of perception.
If only I could see myself the way everyone else does. If only I could be as kind to myself as I am to everyone else.
If only...
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15
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Pit Stains on a Monday
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Posted:Jan 27, 2020 3:13 pm
Last Updated:Jan 29, 2020 4:16 pm
9017 Views
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My office was hotter than hell today.
I wanted to die....
At one point the maintenance technician was in my office and he literally sweated out his pits within a 15 minute span.
I'm pretty sure you could see these pit stains from space.
I was light headed and delirious by the time I was up to go over my Quarterly Self Review with Boss #2.
The review went well and I received an Exceeds Expectations, which made my whole day.
It's not that easy to get an Exceeds Expectations from the Boss Duo...
I didn't even have to give up my first born and donate a kidney.
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14
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What the Fuck Moment #347
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Posted:Jan 26, 2020 7:44 am
Last Updated:Jan 26, 2020 3:54 pm
8220 Views
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So.... Yah.
I'm that girl who has a single brewer coffee maker for those days when she just doesn't think she can drink a whole pot.
Or shouldn't....
Got a call from Wallyworld this morning. Thanks a nationwide glitch in their system, it turned out I had actually do my grocery shopping this morning instead of the planned rolling stop in the parking lot where I sign my name and they throw my food in the back of my car.
Beautiful.
Trying to be the normal, healthy human being I think I can be, I got up, took a shower, and my and I headed out shop.
What does this have do with coffee?
Tired of operating in slow mode from lack of morning coffee, I set up the single brewer make a cup while I put away the groceries.
I could hear the water heating..... Smell the coffee aroma as the hot water hit the grounds.... hear the sound of coffee as it dripped from the maker into.....
I was gathering up the million plastic grocery bags littered across my counter when I noticed the coffee cup sitting squarely in the middle of them.
Shit...
Coffee cup in hand, spinning around behind , my heart beat in my throat as I realized my coffee was brewing into nothing at all and was all over the counter, dangerously close to spilling between the counter and fridge.
"Oh My Fucking God!"
Now, I know you can't imaging it getting any worse than this.....
I was soon to discover this was the least of my worries.
I put the coffee maker in the sink and went to move the microwave to the other counter and discovered the portal to hell beneath it.
Along with the coffee I found the remains of 5 of discarded nastiness. Half eaten crackers... Cheerios.... a Barbie shoe.... red juice stains?? Where in the hell did the pistachio come from?
And thus, this started my day.
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15
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The stars were aligned and the heavens fell into to place....
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Posted:Jan 25, 2020 1:15 pm
Last Updated:Jan 27, 2020 3:34 am
7982 Views
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Miracle of miracles....
After 6 months of being MIA I managed find the laptop cord to my cute, purple laptop.
I feel as though the pieces are all falling into place now.
I will conveniently forget about the part where I've been up since 2:30 am this morning and am still wearing my gross pajama shorts and t shirt.
It's THAT kind of day....
That kind of day where I just ordered my groceries from an online app because I can't fathom the thought of being around people.
That kind of day when I find myself secretly drinking wine from my MOM FUEL coffee cup while my bounces around the apartment all excited because her weird bracelet things came in the today and she can't wait to send the other one to her best friend.
I have to admit, they are kinda cool in theory. Apparently, when you are thinking about the individual wearing the other bracelet, you touch the screen. Their screen lights up for them.
As corny as this sounds, I would totally wear one of these things.
On a positive note....
I managed to complete my Quarterly Performance Self Review for work Monday. The Dynamic Boss Duo will be impressed, I usually throw that bad boy together 20 minutes before my review is scheduled.
What can I say....
Pieces... In place.
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8
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