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One More Time.....
Posted:Jul 3, 2020 7:31 pm
Last Updated:Jul 5, 2020 9:06 am
2324 Views

Last weekend I got a mass text from my Corporate Foreman that we would be off this whole week through the 6th. I needed to text my crew and let them know to stay home and shelter in place. I was also supposed to text the head of the other maintenance crew at my location and make sure she's aware of our shutdown. Covid-19 cases have been rising again and the state is now on mandatory face masks or pay a fine. I text my crew and they are fine with the prospect of a mini-vacation, but before I can even begin to start fantasizing what I'm gonna do with my new found freedom, the other crew leader texts me back that her boss told her they were working 3 days this week.

I text this info back to my Foreman who responds, "No, this is a total shutdown, nobody works". I say "OK" and I wait......... not 5 minutes goes by and I get a text from him agreeing that they are working and someone from our crew will need to be there to make sure they don't fuck something up. I knew it.......

This shit happens every time the corporate office starts "tweaking" our hours. There's the first text that's just like candy in your mouth and before you can even begin to enjoy it, a 2nd text turns it into a piece of mint flavored asshole. So I offer to cover the Mon-Weds days rather than go back to my crew and make them eat ass mints. But of course this other department does fuck things up and by late Weds it was apparent they were gonna have to come back Thursday, which means, "yes", you guessed it, more mints for me.

So, of course they come in late, Thursday. I find busy work nearby so I can leave as soon as they do, and after a few hours I see them taking a break. Stay calm, I tell myself, they'll be done soon. Then they're taking a lunch break. Just when I had almost worked out the details of where I was gonna stash their dead bodies, they informed me they were done. Fuckers!!! So today is my 1st day of shutdown, which I was going to have off anyway because of July 4th falling on Saturday, but I get Monday off, too.

As today was nearing an end I got a text, from my Foreman......
We've got all of next week off until July 13th ........... now I'm just sitting here waiting for this mint to turn to shit in my mouth.......

How is your area doing with the resurgence of Covid-19?
21 Comments
To Protect and Infect!
Posted:Jun 26, 2020 7:25 pm
Last Updated:Jul 1, 2020 5:52 pm
7179 Views
That's what it should say o.n every face mask made. Kind of like the cigarette warnings o.n the side of the package. I noticed that I was getting a small pimple o.n my cheek, then two? Then my other cheek got one!!! And don't even ask m.e explain my dirt filled nose pores. I was expecting a large eruption there at any given moment.

A.l.l this began a few weeks ago. Say, 5 or 6? Possibly right after I went back t.o work full time, wearing a mask day. A mask that was usually soaked in sweat an hour after I started work each day. I knew where they were coming from, what I didn't know is that this disease has a name: MASKNE. From the English word: Mask, "a face covering, not including the eyes". And the Latin: ACNE, "zit, pimple, 3rd eye, Jupiter".

If you are infected, have no fear, we are not alone. This has been a problem for 1st responders from early on. It is a combination of heat and humidity with the mask irritating the skin, termed ACNE MECHANICA. So combine irritated skin and humid human fungi in a damp facial petri dish and voila!!! Pizza Face!! The facial skin of the human species is not capable of withstanding infection from what is basically DUCK BUTTER. You know,"The combination of sweat from the ballsack and anus that creates a buttery film on the grundle and butthole.". Or GOOSE CHEESE, the female version of DUCK BUTTER. That's what's growing there.

So experts say wash your face twice a day, using only your fingertips, and do not wear a mask within 30 mins of applying make u.p or lotions. And most important, just remember, that good looking person you just passed in the frozen food section, has God knows what growing under that mask. It could be swamp ass!!

35 Comments
Passionate Kisses
Posted:Jun 18, 2020 4:50 pm
Last Updated:Jun 25, 2020 7:37 pm
9299 Views
Nothing is harder to do in a relationship than the 1st kiss, but nothing gets things rolling like the 1st kiss. Most of the time you may feel like you know if they want you, but there's still that little voice in the back of your mind telling you he/she "just wants to be friends". You never really know until you get that 1st kiss and that 1st kiss can tell you everything you need to know.

Setting up "the move" can be difficult and is different in every situation. Gone are the days of being young and drunk and just plowing full steam ahead. That approach worked with almost any woman that ever left a bar with me and often the 1st kiss was "in" the bar. Nothing worked better than a slow dance in a country western bar and leaning in and biting her earlobe. That always turned into an "oral meet 'n greet".

Alcohol aside, I always found another good approach was when the conversation stopped and that awkward silence moment appeared. It's either time to kiss or time to go home. I've been fortunate that most of the women that sat for conversations with me were willing to take it farther, not always, but most of the time. One of the most surprising moves I've ever been involved in didn't start with me.

I was set up on a blind date with the sister-in-law of a good friend of mine some years back. Early in the evening I was getting a very strong "friend" vibe from this woman which really relaxed me and let me enjoy the evening for what it was, a nice dinner with a new friend. The evening ended with a hug. yawn.

A few days later she texted me to see if I wanted to hang out, I said sure assuming she liked the very expensive weed I had and I enjoyed her company, so she came to my house. We got high and she was trying to enlighten me on some "new" music that she liked to listen to when she rubbed her eyes and asked if I would mind if she killed the overhead light. I didn't mind, I'd only turned it on to make her feel comfortable. She jumped up and walked behind me to turn it off and as she walked back she grabbed my head and practically performed a tongue tonsillectomy on me. I never saw it coming but surrendered to it like the man- that I am.

I've had very few women initiate the 1st kiss but I've always appreciated them. I totally support a woman's right to make the 1st move. It makes things so much easier.
Do you have a "signature" move to get things going? Have any of you women made the 1st move? Do you have an interesting 1st kiss tale?


29 Comments
Speaking Of Sex.....
Posted:Jun 13, 2020 10:18 am
Last Updated:Jun 16, 2020 4:01 am
9940 Views
Since this is a sex site, I wanted to bring up the subject of sex. Let me start by saying I absolutely love it. I think about it a lot. I would even go so far as to say, I can't live without it, BUT I can, because I have, for much longer than I would like to admit.

Well, that's really all I have to say on the subject. I mean, who wants to hear a bunch of trivia about sex from somebody who isn't getting any? I know I wouldn't!!

So, are YOU getting any?


29 Comments
Let's Make A Deal
Posted:Jun 7, 2020 12:39 pm
Last Updated:Jun 17, 2020 3:27 pm
10887 Views

This Friday night the G-girls came home for the 1st time since early March. This is definitely the longest I've ever gone without seeing them. Especially the oldest. We used get her every weekend since she was 2 weeks old. Mom had t.o h.i.t the bars. O.h well, everyone has their priorities.... The G-girls have lived with for 10 yrs now and growing older hasn't made keeping the house clean any easier.

When they were little I would bring out the large plastic containers and we would make a game out of throwing the toys into the containers. As they got older they both acquired agendas. The eldest was into her arts and crafts, the younger, her Monster High dolls. They're kind of a ghoulish version of Barbie. I'd describe them as "monsters with accessories". Now, they are a.ll about their laptops and cell phones. I know this sounds like things would be easier to keep clean, but nooooooooo, not even close.

Now, the house is littered with empty soda cans, food, candy wrappers, and tangled cords of working and non-working cellphone and laptop accessories. Not to mention the a.l.l-out-daily-search-and-rescue-mission for missing Ear and Air Buds. And these are always panic driven searches. As far as getting them t.o pick u.p their trash and their "stuff"? FUGETABOUDIT !!! A.l.l I ever hear are phrases like "I'm not done yet", "I will before I go bed", and my favorite, "that's not mine". It a.l.l adds u.p t.o nobody picking u.p anything.

I've been wanting pull their bedroom carpet and put down tile for 6 months now and asked them several different ways if they could pick their crap, but haven't gotten any results. Well Friday night I saw a glimmer of hope. The youngest told me she was saving money for something special and had $19 of the $30 she needed and did I have any chores she could do earn $11? I told her I would give her and her sister $20 each if they picked the trash, clothes, shoes, and stuffed animals off their floor.

They were both really excited about this. But they were just going relax Friday night and make a plan. Saturday they were almost ready start, but the oldest wanted go visit her friend over night and the youngest wanted t.o wait for the oldest t.o help, even though I told both of them it was a $40 job and if one of them did it, that one would get of the money.

It's now Sunday afternoon. Nothing has been done. It was so much easier when they were little and they could be bribed or threatened. The "other" G-parents will be here soon pick them because they flip their summer schedule and spend weekdays there and weekends here.

I suppose I could call my friend Lynda de la Mooch. She always needs cash.....
Do you know someone that you always have make a deal with just get them do something?
24 Comments
You Can Pick Your Friends and You Can Pick Your Nose....
Posted:Jun 4, 2020 5:11 pm
Last Updated:Jun 10, 2020 4:45 pm
12264 Views

I received a friend request last week from a couple in New Zealand. Now normally, if I receive a friend request, I accept it. As long as it's a woman or occasionally a couple, but NOT dudes. I'm not gonna have a bunch of dudes in my "friends" group, I'm not about give my competition any free advertising space on my profile page, besides, more than 1 woman has told it gives the wrong "impression", if you know what I mean. I used have a bare butt pic, since I've had compliments on my ass from women, but again, I was told "it's sending the wrong message. Butt, enough about my butt, back to this request...

I get this friend request. I thought it was odd, I've never seen them before, no blog comments to me or from me, I've never received a "view" or a "flirt" from them, just an out of the blue friend request. So, I went to their profile, nearly 20,000 friends. This has the feel of those friend requests that you get on Faceplace from those teenage girls and you go to their profile and see they have several thousand friends. I think they're collectors competing with other teens to see who can get the most friends.

Well, I declined it, which is something I've never done. It just seemed off. After that, I went to my profile and had a look at my current friends. I had about 20. Most sent requests, I accepted, and that was it. No further contact through messages OR blogs, so I had to ask myself, was there any point? Was I a small time collector? With that I decided it was time to clean house. I trimmed my "friends" list down to 8 by using a simple test. All these friends had to have 1 of the following qualifications:
1- someone I've shared messages with.
or
2-someone I've met in the blogs
or
3-someone that gives me a warm feeling in my crotch. Actually, they all give me that!

Are you a friend collector? How many friends do you have?
34 Comments
What The Fuck??????
Posted:Jun 1, 2020 4:22 pm
Last Updated:Jun 15, 2020 6:16 pm
13737 Views

So today, I'm walking out of the room where I'd just spent the last 12 minutes getting my tan and I could hear her. A woman sharing a tale, something about her sister. She was fairly loud, since I had to walk down a hall and make 2 lefts to get to the front door where she was and I could hear her as clear as if she was talking to me. But then, walls in most salons don't go to the ceiling, just high enough to discourage pervs from sneaking a peek, so sound does carry quite well.

As I make that 2nd left I see her, and she sees me. She stops in mid sentence, one arm in the air, over her head, and holds that position for a few seconds. And a few seconds is all I got to look at her before I'm feeling so uncomfortable that I move my sight to the ground in front of me. She continues her story but I can tell by the sound of her voice she's still looking at me. NOW I'm feeling very uncomfortable.

She's in front of the counter with her back to the door, but as I pass behind her, by the sound of her voice, I can tell that she's turned to watch me walk out. By now I'm so self conscious that it's taking every bit of skill that I have to walk normally without tripping or shitting myself, or something else that would embarrass me to the point of never returning.

Once outside I walk briskly to my car, fumble with the keys, drop the keys in the parking lot, I eventually let myself in the car. I can finally relax and absorb what happened. What happened hasn't happened in many years and I am not prepared to handle the situation with an aggressive woman. I don't even know if she was attractive. In that short glimpse I got I know she was short, dirty blond with hair down to her ass, glasses, and her left arm had a full sleeve of tattoos. Other than that, I don't know if she was attractive or Alice the Goon.

It's probably been a good 30 years since anything like that has happened and it really gives me some insight to how women must feel when men come after them like that or worse. Then again, it's been a while since I've been laid, maybe I shouldn't have passed that opportunity up.

So my question to YOU is, how do you handle the "stare down". Do you run, like like I did? Or do you stare right back?
38 Comments
Life Without You
Posted:May 31, 2020 9:14 am
Last Updated:Jun 10, 2020 6:51 pm
12451 Views
Looking back, I honestly feel that I never really appreciated you when you were around. The simple things you did for m.e , the way you made m.e feel, all those good times spent with friends, and all those late nights when it was only me and you. How I've missed you marijuana, it's been 31 days since I've tasted your sweet smokey kiss... soon baby...... very soon....

Right before this Covid-19 pandemic started I was going through the motions for a position with a different company. One of my previous supervisors, Joe, had left for a position with them and set me up for an interview with corporate. I felt that my interview was weak. They always interview you with 2 people, one being Joe, and they rapid-fire you with questions about procedure, technique, equipment, and such. I often find myself flustered trying keep the pace. Despite what I felt was a poor showing, a week later I got a site interview with a site supervisor and, again, my old supervisor, Joe. I felt this one was perfect. A few days later my feelings were supported by a call from Joe asking "if I was offered a position, would I accept". I told him I would provided it was more m.o.n.e.y . He said an offer would be coming.

Then the shutdown happened. So, I started smoking, thinking the shutdown would delay any drug testing. On May 1st I started abstaining, again, knowing when we went back t.o work, if this offer came up, I would need t.o pee clean. Well, Joe called last week asking if I was still interested. I repeated my earlier response, "if there was more m.o.n.e.y , yes". He said corporate would call on Monday with an offer.

I've got mixed feelings about going, more m.o.n.e.y is great, but I've got 2 yrs in here. We also have some huge projects lined up for June/July and I'm gonna feel real bad leaving the crew t.o deal with that, because I've always tried t.o let them know I'm a hands on boss, not a hands on my hips boss. Whatever dirty job we have, I'll be right in there with them. I'm not even sure if this company has a drug test. The NFL has dropped their testing for marijuana, because so many states have legalized it in one form or another.

It's been 31 days and I'm ready see this through and move on with my life. Is there anything you've ever given up for a job or for anything, anyone else?


33 Comments
Can You Tan Your Hide?
Posted:May 23, 2020 8:29 am
Last Updated:Jun 5, 2020 3:54 pm
13876 Views

I come from a long line of "tanners". Well, not real long. I know my Mom and Dad were sun worshipers. Beyond that, the only habits that my relatives had that I know of was my great grandmother on my Dad's side was a swinger. When I was young they took me for a visit to her house and my Holy Roller Grandma had to go in first to make sure she wasn't having one of her "parties". My Mom said they went there once and a bunch of half dressed people went running out the back door.

But back to the topic of this post, both my parents were very tan much of my childhood. I've always liked to maintain a nice tan as well. My 1st wife was olive skinned which combined with my genes created a lineage of tanners that carries on to both of my G-girls. In fact, what takes me weeks, they can achieve in one good day on the beach.

Since joining this site, I've only dated one sun worshiper, the rest were "fair skinned, don't go the beach, SPF3000 wearing pasty-ass shade dwellers". Not that I mind, each their own..... there's something beautiful about that alabaster skin, something classic, royal-ish maybe, but put it next a dark tan and it can elicit unwanted comments. I had some sex videos of myself and a woman I met here a few years back, posted my profile. In the comment section a good amount of people wanted know if she was dead. She was that white. Her "whiteness" didn't bother , but between her and my tan, we had issues with getting the "bright" level correct the camera.

In my 9 years this site I've only met one woman with the ability t.o tan, and the rest didn't or wouldn't. I myself love the sizzle and the smell of tanning, it reminds me of bacon. So, my question isn't whether you DO or NOT, but if your skin WILL tan when left out in the sun?
29 Comments
Let's Be Honest....
Posted:May 15, 2020 4:00 pm
Last Updated:Jun 4, 2020 2:57 am
17426 Views

I was commenting o.n "onelastchan00's blog about people that were lying on their profiles and I thought it might be a good opportunity for u.s t.o fess u.p . Lord knows we "fudge" a little when describing ourselves, it's sort of like trying t.o sell a used car. Who's gonna buy it if you tell them that it gets 8 miles t.o the gallon, needs 3 new tires, and can't get an erection without a good dose of Viagra. NOT that I have a problem getting an erection......I have a problem finding a good use for an erection. But that's beside the point, actually, there's hair beside "the point", and it's nicely trimmed.

Anyway, back my confession:

-sexual orientation: straight/ well, that one is true, not even curious
-looking for: women, couples/ Women, yes. Couples, I'd been watching some porn when I picked that one.
-my birthday is correct, as much as I wish it wasn't......
-relocate? I picked "no", but I would rather say "highly doubtful", but never say never....
-marital status? Deeeevorced, and I got the papers t.o prove it
-swinger type? I picked sex with others, but let's be honest, isn't it the woman who decides?
-height? 5'8" or so, it depends on which Dr I believe, but in that vicinity
-body type? I picked average, but that was well before I sat on my ass for the month of April and put on twelve lbs, but it's going down, bit by fucking slow moving bit
-I don't smoke, but I do toke
-I said I don't drink at a.ll , but I do have a beer or mixed drink now and then
-drugs? I answered correctly: NUNYA
-I said some college but it was actually a tech school in lovely Phoenix AZ. I did like Phoenix!
-occupation: while I'm not a greasy mechanic anymore I was a motorcycle mechanic for 28 yrs so I'll always feel like that is my true profession
-everything else is fairly correct, although for "endowment" I chose avg/avg because I didn't see OMG/ HOLY SHIT for a choice

Well, I'm feeling quite unburdened! Now it's YOUR turn. What did you "fudge" on your profile?
44 Comments
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!
Posted:May 10, 2020 6:32 am
Last Updated:May 11, 2020 5:12 am
20337 Views
I'd like wish you Moms out there a Happy Mother's Day. I hope you have a nice relaxing day and get t.o cook whatever you like for your family today! Thank You for that you do!

13 Comments
PPE: The Solution To A Serious Problem
Posted:May 7, 2020 6:11 pm
Last Updated:May 21, 2020 5:18 am
24677 Views
Personal Protective Equipment? I thought it meant Pretty People Everywhere. When it comes t.o looking for Mrs Right, I'm a "face" person more than any other physical trait. And one thing I've noticed, with everyone covering 2/3 of their faces, the general public is looking a whole lot better. The last time I went grocery shopping I fell in love several times on every aisle. When a.ll you really see is their eyes and their hair, most of the general female population meet the standards t.o become my next Ex-wife. I mean, how bad can eyes and hair look. A.ll you've gotta do is wash that hair and NOT have a stye and your more than halfway there for m.e .

I think that the majority of the general public benefits from wearing a mask. There are some seriously fugly people out there and I'm beginning t.o realize the problem is noses and mouths. I saw a woman just the other day and with her mask she looked quite attractive, but I saw her pull it down and I swear t.o God this chick had more stubble o.n her lip and chin than I could grow in one day.

So, I'm going make the best of this pandemic with a.ll of it's social distancing and protective facial gear, because everyone looks a good sight better with a few feet and a mask between them. Don't you agree?


28 Comments
Would You Like A Valium With That Stick Up Your Ass?
Posted:Apr 29, 2020 8:37 pm
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2020 5:21 pm
37105 Views
I was sitting around today, a day like any other day, minding my own business when I get a Corporate wide email. I get these a.l.l the time. Some are about work, some about management departments talking about forms and deadlines that make no sense , because I'm o.n the lowest part of the scrotum pole, some are about retirement or birthday parties for people I don't know because the company employs about .5K or more people.

So, today I get a mass email from company HQ reminding us to inform HR for any possible Covid contact or infection, yet again. We get this one, or one like it about 3 times a week. Today, there were responses, it's late afternoon, everyone has been sitting at home day, bored, possibly drinking, who knows. For some reason people responded today. Here's how the responses went:

Susan XXXXXXXX- Fuck it , I quit!!!
Laura XXXXXXXX- That language is NOT tolerated and unnecessary!!
Susan XXXXXXXX- No Fuck it! I;m gonna make more money as a stripper, anyway. Besides, I'm usually coked most of the day, every day!!
Laura XXXXXX- This needs stop immediately!!!
Brenda XXXXXXX- OMG, it's still happening!!!
Me- This is better than anything o.n TV!!! hahahahaha
Tom XXXXX- Bahahahaha!!!!
My location foreman- stuart, you need to stop responding to this email, this is going company wide and Susan xxxx's email has been obviously hacked.
Several other people continue to respond with pleas to "just stop responding", and the responses to that keep begging people to "stop responding"

So, after Tom XXXXX responded and validated my joke I was laughing and enjoying my "no longer boring" day. But after my location foreman directly instructs , by name, in front of my audience of .5K or more people, it kind of sucked the wind out of my sails. As embarrassing as THAT was, somehow I knew, I just knew this wasn't over.

So, from that point , I could feel that ever growing stick in my butt getting longer and thicker. Then it happened, about an hour later, my corporate HQ foreman calls . Apparently, the director of operations saw my comment on the email and wanted it passed on to me that it was not acceptable behavior on my part and we do not respond to corporate emails, EVER!

Really? I get phone THAT phone call. I thought maybe the director was gonna invite me over to his BBQ next weekend to do a stand u.p routine. I thought my comment was the perfect comedy relief at the perfect time. There was tension in that email from the moment Susan or whoever hacked Susan's email said "Fuck It". I got the feeling my corporate foreman might have felt that way, too. I got the feeling he was pissed off, pissed off about having to make that call. This place might consider handing out prescription for Valium with ID badges and keys. That or get over themselves.


24 Comments

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