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Posted:Oct 7, 2007 11:42 am
Last Updated:Oct 27, 2007 7:54 pm
17158 Views
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I copied this from [blog lsecretlysexy], who copied it from from [blog Nestorsgurl]:
Smoked pot -- $10
Did acid -- $15
Ever had sex at church -- $25
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you-- $40
Had sex with someone -- $25
Had sex -- $100
Ever had sex with a Asian -- $20
Vandalized something -- $20
Had sex on your parents' bed -- $10
Beat up someone -- $20
Been jumped -- $10
Crossed dressed -- $10
Given money to stripper -- $25
Been in love with a stripper -- $20
Kissed some one who's name you didn't know --$10
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work-- $15
Ever drive drunk -- $20
Ever got drunk at work or went to work while still drunk -- $50
Used toys while having sex -- $30
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- $20
Went skinny dipping -- $5
Had sex in a pool -- $20
Kissed someone of the same sex -- $10
Had sex with someone of the same sex -- $20
Cheated on your significant other -- $10
Masturbated -- $5
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend --$20
Done oral -- $5
Got oral -- $5
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving-- $25
Stole something -- $10
Had sex with someone in jail -- $25
Made a nasty home video -- $25
Had a threesome -- $50
Had sex in the wild -- $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex -- $25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars -- $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older -- $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 -- $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time -- $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- $25
Went streaking -- $5
Went streaking in broad daylight -- $15
Been arrested -- $10
Spent time in jail -- $15
Played spin the bottle -- $5
Done something you regret -- $20
Had sex with your best friend -- $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work --$25
Had anal sex -- $80
Lied to your mate -- $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good --$25
Tally it up and Title it..."My Bar Tab Is"
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Posted:Oct 7, 2007 10:17 am
Last Updated:Dec 4, 2007 8:46 pm
16680 Views
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I have this... burning desire to be with a woman... I haven't been with a woman in a while now... and, well, I kind of miss it.
My problem is that, I can NOT pick up a woman!! I mean, I don't know but it's like I get tongue tied and I don't really know how to approach a woman when it comes to this... And I'm not just talking about on this site, I mean, women period... even women I've known for a while, women that I've liked for a while. The very few times that I have been with a woman is after they've given me clues, or hints, which I didn't quite picked up on, then they finally just told me flat out they were interested.. lol.
I have to say, I can completely relate to those men who just don't know how to approach a woman. I guess it's not as easy as it looks.
Does anyone else have this problem? How do you go for it? What do you say? I know, stupid questions uh?
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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Posted:Oct 5, 2007 5:00 am
Last Updated:Oct 7, 2007 11:03 am
16872 Views
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You are my sadness and faith
my eyes cry in silence for your love.
As I watch myself in the mirror
I see in my face,
All the time I’ve suffered by your absence.
I force my mind to forget the thought of you,
‘cause I am always thinking of yesterday
I prefer to be sleping than awake
For your absence causes me great pain,
Oh how I wish,
That you’d be alive,
That your beautiful eyes would’ve never shut
Just so I could sit here and admire them.
Oh my eternal love,
so unforgettable,
sooner or later
I will be with you
to keep loving you
I have suffered so much by your absence
from that very painful day until today
I do not know what is like to be happy
And even though I’ve got my concence clean
I know I could’ve done more for you.
Dark solitude is what I am living,
the same solitude that must be your tomb.
You are the only love of which I have
the saddest painful memory in my heart.
Oh how I wish,
That you’d be alive,
That your beautiful eyes would’ve never shut
Just so I could sit here and admire them.
Oh my eternal love,
so unforgettable,
sooner or later
I will be with you
to keep loving you.
RIP
Juan D. Perez
10.05.95 - 12.27.95
************************************
Today is his birthday... he would be 12 years old.
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Always Me
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Posted:Oct 2, 2007 8:00 pm
Last Updated:Jul 23, 2012 9:36 pm
25019 Views
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My dear friend Fuzzy wrote a post called Dejected and rejected in her blog. And after reading it, I couldn't stop thinking about it. At work today, her words kept repeating in my head. Perhaps because, well I am the best friend she mentions on her post, the one that has been so busy with her own problems, that has somehow, managed to "forget" about her friend who desperately needs her.
Of course I didn't forget about my friend, and I know that she needs me now more than ever, but sometimes, things happen, and there just isn't enough time in the day or night to get everything you want and need done. That doesn't mean that I don't think about her every day, that I'm not worried about her, and that I'm not here for her in every way.
So, in a desperate attempt to let my friend know that I am there for her, and that I will always be there for her... Fuzzy, this is for you.
*************************************
When you feel like nobody loves you
And that life spits on your face
Remember that you'll always have me
To fight against everything, and help you rise
Remember that you'll always have me... always me.
When you feel that your house is about to explode
And the violence in your family is almost deadly
Remember that you'll always have me
If you need a shoulder to lean on, to help you rise
Remember that you'll always have me... always me.
Remember that behind those clouds
There's a clear sky filled with light
That you can always count on me
That it is always easier,
Between two people to bear a cross
Remember that you'll always have me... always me.
If some day you curse the day you were born
Or if your true love becomes an impossible
Remember that you'll always have me
To fight against everything, to make you smile
Remember that you'll always have me... always me.
When you're afraid of what's to come
When you feel death knocking at your door
Remember that you'll always have me
If you need a shoulder to lean on, to help you rise
Remember that you'll always have me...
I'll be there with you..
Remember that you'll always have me... always me.
Remember that you'll always have me... always me.
Remember that you'll always have me... You'll Always Have ME!
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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Without You
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Posted:Oct 1, 2007 9:32 pm
Last Updated:Jul 23, 2012 9:29 pm
24035 Views
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To live without you is possible,
without very much difficulty.
I live because I wake up,
Just like I go out and sleep
because I sometimes play dominoes.
I live,
because my doctor says,
after taking my pulse
that my vital signs announce that,
I live.
I live,
Because I still breathe
Because I go out to walk,
I live because that's life.
Although,
is worth mentioning
that to live is not to be alive.
to be alive, for me, it's you.
To live without you is possible,
without very much difficulty.
I live because I have a name,
an account number
and my voters registration card.
I live,
Because that's what they call...
That absurd ability to move around.
I live,
Like everyone else does.
I live,
Because some people think that to live,
Is to open your eyes every morning.
I live,
Although I die a little every day,
Because you're no longer here.
And to live is not to be alive.
To be alive, for me, it's you.
I live, without a problem
Although every instant dies worthless
I live, because I survive
Because even if I don't want to
I have to deal with my self
I live,
Although I'm afraid
to live dying, or to die living.
To live without you is possible,
without very much difficulty.
I live,
Because it's quite easy
To breathe in air
and exhale the left overs
I live,
Because there's no way to deny that I exist... If you must call it something.
I live, due to some unknown absurd reason
I live, although I don't feel like joining in with everyone else.
I live, although I die every day.
Because you're no longer here.
and to live is not to be alive.
To be alive, for me, it's you.
******************************
I have to admit, I've been in love a very limited amount of times in my life. But, the times that I have been in love, I have been completely in love. That feeling, has completely soaked my whole being, my soul, my everything.
I guess, the problem is that, I tend to love so... without question, no expectations, no limits. Just a hope... a hope that this person will love me half as much as I love them... but then again, I guess a hope is sort of an expectation... because when everything is said and done... Well, you all know how the story goes.
Anyway, there's never been a time in my life, when my I couldn't picture my life without someone, when I thought that I couldn't live without that person.. but.. as this song clearly states, life does go on, and you find your self, doing what you honestly thought you couldn't do without them... breathing.
Has anyone loved that much?
~ Nessa ~
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Posted:Sep 23, 2007 10:12 pm
Last Updated:Oct 7, 2007 4:35 pm
16726 Views
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Just a quick note to give you all an update on my Unknown.
As most of you advised, I took job #2, in the last week or so, we've dealt with all of the legalities, filled out tons of paperwork, did the whole drug test thing... and I start tomorrow!!
So, wish me luck... lots and lots of luck!!
~ Nessa ~
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Cruel Love
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Posted:Sep 20, 2007 7:15 pm
Last Updated:Jul 23, 2012 9:24 pm
24310 Views
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Love doesn't end
just by saying "goodbye"
one must keep in mind
that being absent
doesn't alienate the memories
doesn't buy forgiveness
doesn't erase us from the map
Just because you're not here
Doesn't separate you from me
the less that I have you
the more I think about you
even though I want to forget you
you're in my mind
and I ask a thousand times
Why is love so cruel?
it doesn't let me forget
it prohibits me to think
it ties me,
unties me,
then slowly it kills me...
it spits me out,
picks me up,
and throws me out again.
Why is love so cruel?
it doesn't let me forget
because even thou you're not here
it enters my blood
it goes through every inch
clawing my soul
and ripping up my heart.
Why is love so cruel?
Love doesn't end
just because you're not here
You can't just erase it,
it's like trying to erase our history
it's like killing our memories
and burning our glories
Why is love so cruel?
it doesn't let me forget
it prohibits me to think
it ties me,
unties me,
then slowly it kills me
it spits me out,
picks me up,
and throws me out again.
Why is love so cruel?
it doesn't let me forget
because even thou you're not here
it enters my blood
it goes through every inch
clawing my soul
and ripping up my heart.
Why is love so cruel?
******************************
1. Do agree with this??
2. Do you ever feel this way?
3. When was the last time you were in love?
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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~ Tagged by SecretlySexy ~
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Posted:Sep 15, 2007 9:54 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2007 10:18 am
16368 Views
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Ten Weird or Random Things, Facts, Habits or Goals:
Once you have been tagged, you have to write a post containing the above. At the end choose 10 people to be tagged, listing their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment (you're it) and to read their blog. You can't tag the person who tagged you.
--------------------------------------------------
1. In school I was in the swim team and the track team.
2. I have always had more male friends than female friends.
3. My favorite flowers are Roses. 2nd runner up is Orchids.
4. On Sundays I like to do absolutely nothing.
5. I recently found out that I just might be addicted to sex! lol
6. I hate to cook!
7. I don't wear dresses!
8. Most of the time, I don't even like to wear panties!
9. I love candles! If I could have candles all over my bedroom and house I would!
10. I collect stuff animals... all kinds!! I still have the very first stuffed animal that was given to me, and I have every single one that was ever given to me after that... They've all been named, and I know who, when, how and why they were given to me as well as what I named them when they were given to me.
I will be tagging the following victims:
1. Fancy_For_You
2. hotnjucy44
3. [blog buttery_delight]
4. [blog WyldWetTreasures]
5. GoddessOfTheDawn
6. [blog badgirl4youtoCUM]
7. [blog illinoiscpl4u]
8. [blog ohcurious14]
9. amberdragonfly
10. [blog somethingelse40]
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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Posted:Sep 14, 2007 10:37 pm
Last Updated:Sep 24, 2008 1:39 am
16754 Views
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Some say love,
it is a river
That drowns
the tender reed.
Some say love,
it is a razor
That leaves
your soul to bleed.
Some say love,
it is a hunger,
An endless
aching need.
I say love,
it is a flower,
And you
it's only seed.
It's the heart,
afraid of breaking,
That never
learns to dance.
It's the dream,
afraid of waking,
That never
takes a chance.
It's the one
who won't be taken,
Who cannot
seem to give.
And the soul,
afraid of dyin',
That never
learns to live.
When the night
has been too lonely,
And the road
has been too long,
And you think
that love is only
For the lucky
and the strong,
Just remember
in the winter
Far beneath
the bitter snows,
Lies the seed,
that with the sun's love,
In the spring
becomes the rose. |
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I don't know why, but this song has become one of my favorite songs... I am very picky about my music, not all songs can quite hit that spot like this song can. For those of you who have never heard this song... (which I find it quite impossible!) I am not taking credit for this song... It's actually a Bette Middler song... But I found that I can't stop listening to it since I first heard it. It's stupid really... But for some reason, this song actually brings tears to my eyes... The words ring so familiar, so true... It just hits me in all the right spots.
This song, makes me think of all the times that I've been hurt, all the times where I thought I had hit rock bottom... the many times when I gave up on love... or thought I had given up... and the other few times in my life, when... Life just didn't seem worth it... and how I have managed to thrive and survive through it all... and most importantly... someway, somehow, I keep finding the strength and courage to give my self, the opportunity to love and be loved again.
There's been plenty of times, when I thought love was not for me, that I wasn't... lucky enough, pretty enough... smart enough. Well, I don't know if that's true, I don't know if luck, beauty or brains has anything to do with love. But I'd like to believe that I should... no, "should" is not the right word... Deserve, that's the word!! I deserve it! I deserve to feel special, wanted, needed, treasured, pampered, and everything that comes with it! I deserve to be loved... and once in a while... I think, I also deserve a rose.
Is it selfish of me to think that way?
What's the song that hits you??
What do you think about when you hear that song?
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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Posted:Sep 11, 2007 8:30 pm
Last Updated:Sep 15, 2007 5:03 am
16851 Views
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I found this on Wyldtyme2nite's blog, she requested the people in Folks That Love Sex to read it. I found it so incredibly sad and heartbreaking that I thought I'd post it here.
*********************************
When I was a student at IU I would drive often from Bloomington Indiana to New York City and as would be the case I would begin to nod off, but a funny thing would happen when I hit Delaware, I would get a surge of energy seeing the Twin Towers. They were my beacon of hope that in less than two hours I would be in the heart of the city.
Those hopes and that beacon would be no more. I did not know it but my two day escape to the city would be my farewell to the Twin Towers.
Its unfathomable how one can feel a sensation of joy one day and 10 days later feel a sense of loss. I needed to get away from life and had decided to visit the city and visit my brother's crypt on the way in.
Two years had pass since my investment failure but I was catching up with debt but needed a break. I had often thought if I got back on my feet I would invite a select few to dine at Windows on the World. It would be a celebration that life was perfect. I figured I needed inspiration, so I chose to visit the Twin Towers late afternoon on the First of September.
I walked around seeing the city from every angle. I felt I was on top of the world. As I left the observation tower I felt a sense of sorrow which did not make sense. I exited Tower One onto the street and saw the fountain with Swing music playing loud. Time froze for a moment as I looked up and took in the scene. The sorrow returned. I shook my head and told myself what was I feeling. I will be back. And we will dine at Windows on the World. It may take me 10 years but I will be back and nothing was going to stand in the way.
I headed back west the next day. As I crossed into Delaware and past the state line into Pennsylvania I noticed the Twin Tower fade until they disappeared.
The phone rang. It was about 9:45 in the morning.
The only thing I could understand was turn on the tv. My thought was to question such action. Why turn on the tv. I was sleeping. Again I would hear turn on the tv. As I questioned such action out loud, I was informed that the Twin Towers had fallen. My hairs stood up and curled. As I watched CNN I could not comprehend what had happened. It seemed like a bad dream from which I wish to awaken. Awaken I could not. I was awake and it was real. They were gone. I spent the rest of the day and the day after contacting friends and family in NYC. All were fine.
But this is not about how 9/11 affected my life nor is it about my feelings towards terrorists. This is about the men and women of the NYPD, FDNY and the construction workers post 9/11. This is not about our soldiers in Iraq. This is about our disgraceful actions towards those who risked their lives and survived 9/11. This is about the relief and clean up workers who volunteered to seek and hoped to find survivors. This is about those who volunteered to find the dead bodies to help families begin the grieving process as they lay their deceased to rest.
I Have a cousin who was a NYPD detective she was a first responder to the horror of that day and a volunteer. She is now retired. She chose retirement due to the horror she witnessed that day and the aftermath. In time she would come to realized that her retirement would have been forthcoming. She has cancer in the lungs. She is not and has never been a smoker. But nonetheless she has it and her fate is sealed. So too are those of many others thanks to Christine Todd Whitman's poor assessments of the toxic levels post 9/11.
Yes I acknowledge that today is a day or remembrance and mourning, but the day can not be truly mourned until we mourned for those whose lives have been cut short post 9/11 and for those like my cousin who shall follow. Some may view it as unpatriotic, a slap in America face on such a hollowed day. But it would be an insult to those who risked their lives and survived only to have their fate sealed. Doomed to suffer. And to add injury to insult our government and the city of NYC refuse to acknowledge that they made a mistake. That maybe it would have been wise to well equip the individuals who volunteered to rescue the living and dig out the dead.
To continue to deny these heroes proper treatment and to have insurance companies deny their claim to medication they so justifiable need is reprehensible. It is a day of mourning but not for those that perished on 9/11 but for those that volunteered to die post 9/11. I will never know how it feels to live with death at your door. I can not imagine the feelings or thoughts that by being heroic and doing your job you condemned yourself to a slow withering death. How must she feel to know that the day will come when she will no longer be able to walk let alone get out of bed. And to face an uphill battle against red tape. This is not how you reward your heroes. This is blasphemy. If the insurance company will not honor their policy then our government should step in and make them do so or at the very least help our soon to be fallen heroes. Unfortunately as I write these words, I come to the realization that if our Government can not provide for the welfare and care of our injured soldiers stateside how can I expect it to provide for our 9/11 heroes. That to me is unpatriotic. That to me is an insult and a sin that can never be forgiven.
I concluded by asking not only a moment of silence for the fallen heroes of 9/11 but for those whose fates have been sealed. A moment of silence for them and a prayer for their families that suffer through the ordeal of seeing their hero wither and fade from their lives.
God may you give our soon to be fallen heroes strength and constitution to endure their fate. May they be surrounded by love through the grace of their friends and family. May you grant their friends and family strength to overlook their fallen hero's withering condition. May they have the constitution to make their fallen hero's final days filled with joy and love and give them strength to move on when the time comes when you beckoned their hero to join your flock of angels. For as they have been angels to many on earth on that frightful day and on other numerous days, they will now truly become angels. God look over them and their families and bless them all. Amen.
*********************************
If you find it in your heart to stop by her blog and leave her a comment, please do so... If you prefer to do it here, that's welcomed too, but I think she needs the comforting.
~ Nessa ~
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Posted:Sep 8, 2007 12:51 pm
Last Updated:Sep 23, 2007 10:08 pm
16651 Views
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As most of you know, I started working on Friday at the company which I was working a few months ago. What you don't know is that the day before I started working there, I went to another interview for the competition of the company that I am now working at. Well, yesterday morning, as I was walking through the doors at my first day of work, I got a call saying that they would like to bring me on as of the end of this month. So, now I'm sort of confused I guess... I'm not sure if I should take that job or stay where I am. So I thought, perhaps if I got some of my friends point of view, it would help me see things that perhaps I am not considering. So, let me lay it out for ya.
Job # 1
1. Pays ok
2. Worked there before
3. Is a temp. They're not sure if they will be hiring anyone at this time.
4. I was refereed to be hired last year but I still wasn't hired.
5. It's a 2 hour drive from home.
6. It's a very satisfying job.
7. They have really went out of their way to bring me back this time.
8. I heard they are outsourcing a lot of to India because labor there is cheaper and they have fired a lot of people.
9. Was told that if I leave the assignment now, I will not be called back to work for any future Annual Enrollment periods.
10. People that have worked there permanently for years are only making a few cents more than when they started.
11. I get to help people, educate them, and assist them in making choices which will have a huge impact in their lives.
Job # 2
1. Pays about $4.00 to $8.00 more than job #1
2. Is in the same field that I'm working at right now
3. Is more of an administrative job.
4. Is a Temp to hire.
5. I was told they really really want me.
6. I'm not so sure it would be so satisfying as job #1
7. It's closer to home, about 30 - 45 minute drive.
8. Was also told that if I did not get hired for the admin position after the contract was over, that they could find a position with their benefit specialist department or customer service department for me.
9. I have a feeling that I would be helping companies screw their employees with their benefits which will have a huge impact in the companies pockets!
10. More work, more responsibility (which is fine by me btw)
11. Will be assisting 5 or 6 people with their job.
Ok, so there is... sort of a run down... what are your thoughts?? I'm not asking what would you do, because we're all different, and I know that most people, my sister included, don't really care what they do for a living as long as they get paid... But isn't feeling good about the kind of work you do and how you help people important too??
I really like job #1, it's about the first job that I've EVER had that truly made me feel good about my self, when you get a call, from someone who's 90 years old, who's wife, or husband died, and now this person has received tons of paperwork and packages of rules and provisions in which he/she has to base a very important decision of which benefits will they be enrolling for the rest of the year, and those minus well be written in chinese because half of these people can't understand them. So they call ME, because their significant other was the one that always did this, and they are completely and hopelessly lost, and I sit there, and explain everything they've received in a way that they can understand and help them figure out what choices they have and which one works best for them... At the end of that call, when they tell you how wonderful you are for helping them, and thank you with such sincerity, and you KNOW that you did help, that this person who's living on a pension will not have to spend money they don't have, but will still receive the same level of benefits. It makes you feel good inside.
On the other hand, the other job could very well have me helping people too, I honestly don't know, the pay is DEFINITELY better, it's closer to home it sounds great!! And I am interested... I'm just not sure if it's worth burning the bridge at my current job. ya know? Maybe if I could think of other questions that I can ask to help me decide.
I just don't want to be, as my grandmother put it, "como el perro con las dos tortas" - like the with two bones, that can't decide which one he wants and therefore losses both of them.
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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Posted:Sep 6, 2007 8:10 pm
Last Updated:Sep 8, 2007 12:57 pm
16402 Views
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Just a quick note to let you all know that you may not see me around so often... Tomorrow is my first day back at work... I have been called back to work to the company I was working at earlier this year, hopefully this time I'll get a full time position. I also have another piece of news for ya... but that's gonna have to wait for now. It's kind of a long story, well not really, anyway, I don't even know if it will happen or not, so I better not jinx it.
Wish me luck on my first day at work!!!
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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Posted:Aug 31, 2007 8:30 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2007 3:42 pm
16484 Views
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The bad news is that quitting smoking may not reduce your chances of getting lung cancer; however the good news is that now you have a good reason not to quit smoking.
The BC Cancer Agency recently released a study that found that although some genes can be repaired after a person quits smoking, not all of them do, especially the ones that combat lung cancer. This explains why approximately 50% of new lung cancer diagnoses are of people who had quit smoking. Now I have another excuse not to quit smoking ‒ and to think, the only good reason I ever thought to not quit smoking was keep people in the tobacco industry employed.
Seriously though I do want to quit smoking, I just haven’t very been proactive about it since I haven’t quite reached that point where I want to quit more than I want to keep smoking. To be nakedly honest with you, I love smoking and the way it makes me feel. I like smoking while I drink or talk on the phone. I like smoking while going for a walk or typing on the computer. I like smoking after a meal. I like smoking. I like it. I love it. I crave it. I indulge it. I know I shouldn’t but I do. They say smoking is one of the hardest addictions to break free of and as I person whose quit an addiction to alcohol I can totally attest to the extreme addictiveness of cigarettes. Compared to quitting smoking quitting alcohol was a walk in the park, quitting smoking is more like trying to walk in a park when you’re a paraplegic. But nonetheless, I plan getting there one day (I always said either when I’m pregnant or 30 ‒ whichever one comes last), needless to say I've been 30 for a whole year now, and I've been pregnant (I did quit during my pregnancy though) so until I finally decide to quit, I guess I’ll keep spending the money I should be saving for my retirement on cigarettes ‒ might as well since according to this study no matter if I quit now or not I’m still not going to live as long as everyone else.
~*~ Miztress Nessa ~*~
FTLS
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