A slice of the day
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Posted:Feb 24, 2014 9:23 am
Last Updated:Feb 25, 2014 6:20 am
8281 Views
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*walks into the room and there is Mom going through mail with her cane leaning beside her, pillow under her splinted right arm and a blanket draped precariously around her*
me: whatcha doin?!
Maternal Unit: *looks up kinda startled* Uh ...I have to go to the bathroom.
me: Okay, well you have my permission then.
Irascible Maternal Unit: OH, your "permission" huh?
me: Yeah well ...the only reason I can think of that you'd be going through the mail when you've really got to go to the bathroom is if you're just waiting for permission.
Reminded Irascible Maternal Unit: Oh ...yeah, yeah *shuffles off to the back* (presumably to the bathroom)
She really is amusing sometimes ...like a caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Why in the world she would think I care if she's going through the mail, I have no idea; she seems almost "guilty" when I "catch" her doing something. Especially when it's not something that I care much about in and of itself, but my concern is more aligned with thoughts of her tripping over herself while doing it when juggling three other items at the same time.
Last week, when we stopped off at the store on the way home from the doctor, she had one arm, a cane, a coat, her purse ...and she wanted to try to grab grocery bags before I could stop her. Only problem was, she didn't have enough hands to do it. I find myself in the position of trying to load everything up to make in one trip (which I'm a little bit too notorious about doing anyway), so she won't try to hurry in and then back out again to grab anything I leave *which to be fair, isn't really even possible while still trying to use the colloquial definition of the word "hurry"* She hasn't exactly been "bad" about this kind of thing since her fall, but she often at least tries to make the obligatory attempt at it, just to maintain the "irascible" image (and more often than not, simply being in the way while doing it).
So this is going to be me in how many years?!
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le-sigh, le-see and le-thar-gee
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Posted:Feb 23, 2014 9:35 am
Last Updated:Feb 24, 2014 5:52 am
8333 Views
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Wow ...I have quite a few things bouncing around in my head today, and yet nothing that I particularly wish to write about.
Mom woke up feeling pretty ill today, and she wasn't feeling particularly well yesterday either. She finished this cycle of chemo Thursday night, so it's a bit odd that she only started feeling sick after she finished the cycle. This particular drug hasn't given her much trouble ...it's been better on her blood counts than the previous regimen, but she's not really taking an effective dosage either.
It's a bit of a long story, but when she first started it there was a bad reaction that turned out to be an interaction with another drug she was on at the time. The oncologist reduced to the lowest possible dosage and remarked that she had doubts that the lowered dosage would even be effective. On the plus side, for the first two months the cancer numbers dropped considerably so she never upped the dosage. On the minus side, we only got two months of reduction, and they've been steadily rising since. Depending on what this next weeks blood tests show, it's very probable that something is going to need to change. Either up the dosage, try another chemo (there is one alternative that only passed the FDA around the end of last year), or stop treatment. I don't see the last one happening.
I don't think that many would really characterize me as a pessimist, but I can't say as I'm overly optimistic either. I don't tend to overthink things too much, but I do almost always try to prepare myself for the worst.
Okay, I think that's all the time I'm going to give myself on this line of thought *ick*. I think I shall go clean the kitchen and see what I can get out of that.
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scary that this sort of thing happens
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Posted:Feb 22, 2014 7:39 am
Last Updated:Mar 12, 2014 12:14 pm
7948 Views
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Wow ...just wow.
I was walking the yesterday and stopped for a minute to visit with a guy that I've seen around every now and then; I've probably only stopped to talk with him three or four times though. He has a really cute long-haired chihuahua and I see him out walking from time to time; I'd guess him to be somewhere around my age although probably a bit older.
Okay, let me go back a little bit first. I live with my mother; I dunno why I get such a kick out of playing that up, but I'm her caregiver not some n'er do well leech of a . As much as I joke about it, sometimes I think it doesn't even register that the reason that it's a bit of a joke is that perhaps utter shitheads are a bit more common than anyone really wants to admit. Every now and then I just get that huge splash of cold wet reality right in the face and hope that it's just an obscure happening and not something that approaches "normal."
I was reading a blog a while back in which a chick was saying that she didn't date guys who lived with their mothers (although she did throw in a caveat for guys who were caregivers); I guess I just never realized how "not necessarily out of the ordinary" this shit is. I had remarked once about "But I'm RICH!!! ...by living with my mother, I'm saving so much money on condoms that I'm just rolling in dough!"
I'm just blown away though. I admit to having a guilty pleasure for reading the craigslist personals from time to time ...I guess everyone likes to feel superior to someone from time to time, but Webster's could actually put "see craigslist personals" under the the definition for "delusional."
So anyway, The dude was out walking his and of course my little muttifer had to drag me over to say hello. Look to previous blog entries about how apparently my has an affinity for *fucking* crazy people.
...if this were gossip, that would be one thing; I take gossip with a grain of salt. ...but this guy told me this right to my face about himself.
1) He lives with his mother. 2) There's a garage sale today at his mothers house. 3) The bank is foreclosing on her home, so she has to sell all her stuff. I'm unclear as to whether selling all her stuff is to raise money for the mortgage, or to finance somewhere else to move to.
Apparently (this is in his own words) he was supposed to be making the payments, but he just didn't; (again, his exact words) "I just didn't think they'd try to foreclose this quickly." ...and then he kinda shrugged, and started studying the ground.
...and then for good measure he added: "I don't even have anywhere to go now."
As if the near-stranger would say "Wow dude, sorry you lost your Mom's house ...why don't you come and live with us? ...maybe you could make the mortgage payments for us TOO!" Holy over-sharing Batman! ...my thoughts were more along the lines of "So what about your mother?" ...but I think I was just a bit dazed that this breed of shithead actually exists!
...and I feel guilty because I have a tendency to (kind of) ignore my own Mother when she starts rambling about things she has to do or people that she knows. I've been caught once or twice when it registers that she's talking about something I need to be hearing and I have to "Um ...whut?!?" after a "maybe I should put the cat in the blender" or "I think I should donate my estate to the Disabled Circus Midget Care Fund." Mostly she just talks to try and organize her own thoughts, but I truly feel bad for just "tuning her out" but I'd rather tune her out than get exasperated about something she can't help. ...and call me a jerk, but actually attempting to truly listen to four renditions about every minute detail she can think of about the guy who picks up the trash in her office is actually a bit taxing on the nerves.
I guess next time I feel a bit down on myself, I can always fall back on "Well, at least I haven't lost her fucking house."
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I'm just a stationary guy
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Posted:Feb 20, 2014 12:26 pm
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
7196 Views
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There seems to be a little bit of randomness going on out there today (I was thinking about the old Steve Martin bit in the "Wild and Crazy Guy" days where instead of being a "Rambling Man" he was "Just a Stationary Guy." I can't really get organized to write anything too terribly specific, but some interesting sub-happenings have been going on.
If it weren't for having an extremely cute little dog, I suspect that I'd be a real hermit. I get to meet a lot of the neighbors and where I like most of the people around here ...lets just say that there are some that are pretty ...ummm, colorful.
There's the one guy three houses down that goes out every evening and walks every inch of his lawn with a five gallon bucket in hand and picks up any leaves, trash ...perhaps even bee pollen. I'm a little on the OCD side, but when I see folks like him, I always feel a lot better about myself. My absolutely loves the guy ...he'll literally plant his feel and won't even let me drag him off until he has a chance to go say hello and get a few pats on the head. I haven't seen him in a few days, but I'm sure he's around ...I guess I could toss a gum-wrapper in his yard if I want to make sure he's okay.
Yesterday I ran into a woman I don't see very often ...she's always pleasant enough, but she's always had this sort of "vibe" about her that she isn't quite playing with a full deck. Like Mr. OCD-dude, of course my LOVES the lady and she thinks he's the greatest ever (he does this obscenely cute little "bouncy-bounce" run to see her if she's outside). She was out yesterday and he drug me over to visit; he got a few scritches on the head and was mostly ready to keep walking, but then the lady started in talking to me.
...and talking, and talking.
First about how cute the is, second how sorry she was about my Mom, third about how her is mad at her, told her that she thinks she's senile because she caused a scene at a party last year that she hadn't even bothered to attend and her only thinks she was there but has the audacity of accusing her of being the senile one and if she were to move she wouldn't tell the where she moved to which was just as well since the has been telling her every time she comes over that she doesn't want anything to do with her because she never did anything for them when they were even though she sewed their clothes with her own two hands...
*jerks the dogs leash to get him to stand up while I back away slowly*
"Wow ...I'm so sorry to have forgotten that you are totally fucking crazy, but we've really got to move along now!"
No, I didn't actually say that (although I was probably thinking it really really loudly); the muttifer did manage to enthusiastically remember why we were out at least and gave me a good excuse to move along quickly. Maybe I should put her in touch with my crazy neighbor from my previous apartment.
Yikes!
Mom is going a little worse today ...a bit bored on top of general malaise I think; I'm not really sure what to do to help her out (that won't drive me bonkers as well). She's been obsessing over some trivialities of late ...when we went to all the doctor visits the other day, she was a bit bent out of shape over forgetting to bring a notepad and a pen to take notes on the doctor visits. I told Mom I didn't think we were in too much danger of her being the one to take notes (and even in less danger of being able to read what she writes with her left hand anyway), and my tablet didn't require a pen. She still chided herself for being unprepared.
Last night I did a movie that ought to go over well with a lot of folks here in arfbarfbarf-land; another one of the super low-budget zombie flicks that actually turned out pretty good ...it was called "The Stink of Flesh" and it was about a swinger couple that had a little bit more difficulty finding fuel for their "alternative lifestyle" now that everyone was dead.
The makeup was laughable, the plot was shaky but still managed to keep you interested enough to really want to see how it played out. I'll add it to the list of pretty cool cheapies. If you like zombie movies, it's worth a looky-loo!
Up tonight: "Alien Raiders" ...we shall see. 
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suck, SUCK, SUCK!!!
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Posted:Feb 19, 2014 7:49 am
Last Updated:Feb 19, 2014 7:51 am
6978 Views
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The other day I wrote a quick post about what movies to watch after the "Critter's" marathon (yeah, cuz those movies are such a tough act to follow). I think I managed to top any of the "Critters" herd in terms of total suckage with the movie from last night.
I love movies ...I'm not watching near as many since moving in with Mom, but I've always been an avid movie fan. I have a wide and varied range, but my tastes are really pretty shallow for the most part. I want to be entertained more than intellectually stimulated; I enjoy "good" shlock films ...within reason, action and sci-fi. I enjoy a lot of drama movies, but they'll never be my first choice.
The one constant, is that I really do grade on a sliding scale. I really want to re-watch "Primer" ...it's been a while, but it is one of the ultimate examples of how a really low-budget movie can be really REALLY good. "Robot and Frank" is another shoestring budget, but still an excellent movie.
My movie last night was a little bit dated ...but from around the same times as "Mission to Mars" (*grunt, moan*) and "Red Planet" (*ugh, argh*); the title of this abomination: "Stranded" from the year 2001. I'm almost grateful for this movie, because I really didn't think there was anything that could (comparatively) redeem the more recent "Stranded" with Christian Slater. I'm thinking someone with better ideas for a movie named "Stranded" can go nowhere but up, but also that perhaps the title is just cursed or something.
I dunno though. I love the Internet Movie Database, and was a bit shocked that it had a rating of 5 or so. I read a few of the reviews in a futile attempt to understand how anyone could find any redeeming value in the movie at all; the acting was on a level with a high school play (as well as the astronaut recruitment agency who chose that range of characters to fly to Mars ...probably from the parking lot at "Home Depot"), the characters weren't even remotely believable ...and probably only relatable to a very small subset of people. Anyone with even a minor knowledge of science would be a bit insulted by most of the liberties taken. I haven't seen such an ill-prepared group of "scientists" since ...oh wait ...maybe "Prometheus" (another one I'd kind of like to watch again to see if it's as bad as I thought it was the first time).
So yeah ...it's one to avoid. I have to admit that there was one little part that I found pretty amusing. One guy keels over dead from lack of air in his suit, as the second guy is in the process of dying from asphyxiation ...the leader calls to him that "hey, you've got to come see this!" ...and he suddenly gets better (that was almost as good as the "running the hand over the spacesuit helmet bubble" to close the eyes of the first dead guy).
So yeah ...time to find something a little more realistic to "cleanse" myself from the bad taste left in my mouth from that one.
...maybe "Jason X" from the Friday the 13th movies.
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eighty-one
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Posted:Feb 18, 2014 2:02 pm
Last Updated:Feb 19, 2014 6:15 am
6919 Views
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degrees.
...no really! That's what it is outside right now (we have really strong winds, so I hope our glorious governor doesn't try to organize another "pray for rain" day); I got an e-mail from a friend in VA who had three feet of snow a few days ago, and suddenly I feel good about Texas! I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt yesterday, and the muttifer is panting loudly, so it might be time to do a little bit of grooming soon.
It's been a long morning ...three doctor visits for the maternal unit today, and she's about worn out.
This is the first time in quite a few years that I've absolutely hated having to accompany Mom to the doctor. Visiting the neurologist about memory issues forces me to be in the position of having to talk about Mom as though she's not sitting right there by me.
...it somehow feels profoundly disrespectful (not to mention hard on her pride) to have to do it, but Mom can't answer the question accurately; it isn't as though there is an alternative though.
bleh.
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what was that again?
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Posted:Feb 17, 2014 8:27 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
6393 Views
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hmmm ...I can't remember what the perfect blog title for poor memory ought to be.
This morning a phone call came in a little bit early; it was the neurologist confirming an appointment for tomorrow and although it was a bit early, I'll let it pass because at least it was a real person. I gave the requisite yeppers response, and Mom asked who it was ...I told her it was the neurologist confirming her appointment for tomorrow. She asked what we were seeing that particular doctor for, and I told her that we were seeing that particular doctor in hopes of figuring out why she couldn't remember what we were seeing her for.
Our family really does somewhat thrive on that sort of humor; Mom laughed and affirmed that YES her memory needed all the help it could get. This particular neurologist is fairly new; the old one retired last summer and he is very missed. The vote is still out on the new one; she does fine with me, but I'm still not sold on her experience in geriatrics.
Mom's memory started taking a plunge last year in the late summer. My Dad had Alzheimers, so the mental issues are probably the least welcome side-effect on the table. When the problems she was having started having a noticeable effect, the old doctor said we could try one of the memory drugs, but he was not a believer in them personally (I believe his exact words were "If memory drugs really worked, we'd all be taking them"). We tried them for six weeks and had nothing to show for it but some obscure side-effect issues, and he had her stop.
The new doc has had Mom on another type for three months and is a true believer in the things though, so I'm not sure how tomorrow will go. I have every intention of asking her to discontinue them; I'm not seeing any ill side-effects, but not only is she not getting better, if anything she's getting leaps and bounds worse. Correlation doesn't equal causation, but still ...where medication is concerned, I'll always take less over more; especially if I'm not seeing anything positive. It's sure getting difficult to be around though.
My sister and her hubby came by last night and brought dinner; the intention had been that Sis would help Mom take a shower and wash her hair. Only thing was that Mom decided that she didn't want to; in fact, she put up a fuss the day before and had me lay out things for a sponge bath and asked my sister to come by today instead. Now today, she's wanting me to help try to get the stuff together for her to try to do it herself before the sister gets here.
I had a brief discussion with her the other day about being contrary for no other reason than to be contrary. I mean, I'll help her do whatever she wants to do ...I'd rather be there to pick up the pieces if something goes wrong than further push her into trying something by herself (unaided) that's a disaster waiting to happen. Geez, this morning she was asking for help putting on a robe over her splint that wouldn't fit because she was wearing a freaking splint!
Holy fucking "flashbacks to Dad" though.
It does appear that I may be getting a little bit of help soon in any case, so we shall see.
I'm off to do something ...now if I could only remember what it was.
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the post-computer age?
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Posted:Feb 16, 2014 10:17 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
6462 Views
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The "Jinx and geriatrics" post had actually been about three times longer, but the chrome browser I use picked a *fucking* messed up time to lock up on me.
I'm a computer geek from wayyyyy back; not quite sure how many here would remember the days of backing up "config.sys" and "autoexec.bat" (and later on "win.ini" and "system.ini") on a regular basis just in case something went wrong. I still have a habit of highlighting my posts and crtl+c the whole thing before I hit the "post" button (when I'm not writing the whole thing in wordpad "JUST IN CASE" something like what happened with that post happens). I hit the "preview" button and crashed the browser; disaster only seems to strike when you aren't ready for it though. (Okay, that's not quite true; those are just the times that you really remember, but it would still be nice if disaster would give at least 48 hours notice.)
Nothing quite thoroughly fucks up your day like spending a half hour writing something, and then losing it like *fucking* that. So now I do the ctrl+c even before hitting the *fucking* preview button too, even though this is the first time it's happened to me under these circumstance.
...I mean, because I know at least a gazillion people in arfbarfbarf-land are hanging on every *fucking* word about how *fucking* messed up my mother's doctors are. (as if that were even the point)
Crazy thing nowadays though; it occurred to me the other day that we're kind of entering the "post-computer age." I read a stat the other day that surprised me a little bit ...in the USA, households average at least five wireless devices and we are a full generation into the common age of computers (where it's almost more unusual NOT to have a computer than have one). Hell, my cellphone has a bit more "oomph" than the laptop I'm (still) using; I use a tablet when I'm in bed and can surf the full version of the site just as easily on it as the laptop.
I mean really ...I was in a "Wendy's" the other day that would have been perfectly comfortable in a five or ten year old sci-fi movie set 30 years in the future. The menu signs were touchscreen interactive and all the menus on the walls were actually large screen TV's. The drink dispenser was interactive as well, sporting a full-touchscreen control and not a single moving part on the outside.
What used to be new and exciting is slowly starting to seem more and more "normal" even when it's fairly new. I still remember like yesterday a friend bragging on building his new house with cat-5 jacks in every room because he KNEW computers in every room were going to be the coming thing. That whole "wireless" thing was still a few years off; he saw it coming, just not the full scope.
And now we're nearly two generations removed from the time when people like me thought that anyone (much less everyone) carrying a wireless telephone was a pipe-dream.
On that note ...I guess I'm off to find my abacus to do this months bills (just kidding, I do them on my 386; I'm *fucking* modern!).
...if I can find my stamps after the dot-matrix printer finishes printing them.
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well that was ...uhm
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Posted:Feb 15, 2014 8:00 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
5403 Views
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I finally made it through all four!
...and it only took about eight days.
But of course, I'm talking about the "Critters" movies (what else would I be talking about). Holeeeeeey shit ...although mildly interesting to see such a young Billy Zane (the first one ...and he got eaten really early), and a pre-"Gilbert Grape" Leonardo DiCaprio in the third one; there really wasn't very much redeeming about those movies. I had a difficult time even being nostalgic, and some of the 80's schlock films really were just too much fun. I think one of my favorites ever was "Return of the Killer Tomatoes" (with a young mullet-sporting George Clooney in the supporting role no less).
But wow ...the first "Critters" was at least mildly amusing, and I guess all of them were sufficient for their general purpose: something to watch that will either put me to sleep, or at least provide entertaining "lazing in bed" fare. Critter's 3-4 were pretty bad though (at least 2 had a naked chick to distract from the hand-puppets with a bunch of teeth); even for campiness fans like me, the last two were just a bit too much.
Not quite sure what I'll run with tonight ...perhaps I'll break down and get back to my book, but I've been having fun of late with the movies (bad and otherwise). Hhmmm ...I may have to revisit "The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra"
suggestions anyone?
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on jinx and geriatrics
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Posted:Feb 14, 2014 2:29 pm
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
5405 Views
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*looks around and whistles loudly*
Hey Cupid!!!
*Flips the bird* (probably for a bit longer than necessary)
Suddenly I think of that scene from "300" when the arrows from the Persian Army come raining down *starts looking around for a shield*
Now that the public service part of this blog is out of the way, I can get back to the important part of this post: jinx and geriatric doctor adventures.
So ...to begin, we will talk about jinx.
Some idiot made this statement in a blog yesterday:
The Nephrologist called yesterday and asked about the blood tests they never asked us to get ...I'm kind of hoping that we won't be paddling down that same river again.
Man oh man, would I like to get my hands on that dude.
So first off, I should mention that this was the second Nephrologist we have seen; when Mom's kidney numbers started getting a little bit scary, they made a referral. On top of not being located at our usual hospital, the initial one we saw was a real head-case ...I suspect she had watched a few too many episodes of "House" or something, but she had a bedside manner probably gleaned from Freddy Krueger (who at least had a sense of humor while ripping out your kidneys). Doc House seemed absolutely genial compared to this chick though; we didn't care for her at all. She ordered some tests and scheduled a follow-up three months later (given her personality, it probably takes patients about that long to convince themselves she really wasn't all that bad).
At out last visit with the Oncologist when we mentioned who we saw, the Oncologist let slip an "ohhhh ...HER huh?!" remark, and then suggested that we make an appointment with her partner who had an office upstairs. She said more than likely, the first doctor was simply because the one upstairs had been out of the country.
So ...I called to request a change in doctors and explained that I preferred to have as many of Mom's doctors under one roof as possible (it sounded a lot better than "That other chick is a real BITCH" in any case); they didn't give me any trouble at all with the change (I expect it may happen fairly often). I also explained that the oncologist had some reservations about the test that were ordered being conclusive, and asked to consult with her.
Once again, no problems, no arguments ...who could have thought that this might be foreshadowing
...the events to come!
*dump dum DUUUMMMMM*
So we went to the office ...managed to show up early (which is a rarity where my Mother is concerned), and the lights were off in the office and the door was locked. At 2:00. We're kind of thinking ...wow, must be some lunch break. So we wait ...and wait; finally a building employee asked us if we had a problem ("you mean besides having an appointment, but no doctor?"). He unlocked the door and went back, then returned saying that the entire office was empty. He said that he didn't recall ever seeing the office open on a Thursday and suggested we call the number.
Yeah ...for somebody who changed doctors for the sole purpose of moving to that building, they still managed to make an appointment at the other hospital. To give them at least a little credit for not being totally in the wrong, I'm pretty sure they told the right location when they called to confirm ...but all I heard was McKinney (the hospital we go to now is brand new and I still haven't gotten accustomed to a town the size of McKinney having two major hospitals). Still though ...it isn't exactly a small fuck-up either.
Naturally there was a four car accident on the highway on the way making the 15 minute drive into a 45 minute one. We got there, and find that the Nephrologist not only didn't consult with the oncologist, she didn't even check the chart beforehand. She tried to tell us that the previous testing showed the kidney function as fine, forcing me to take out the most recent comprehensive testing from the Oncologist showing that ummmmm ...not so much. In fact, after one look at the (more recent) numbers, she also said she couldn't even prescribe the medication she wanted to try out.
So let's just say we were thoroughly underwhelmed. She did promise to meet with the Oncologist before doing anything further, and wants to do a bit more testing.
gurhhhh ...about the only way this could get more fucked up is if it were Valentines Day or something.
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...speaking of yellow rivers
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Posted:Feb 13, 2014 7:51 am
Last Updated:Feb 14, 2014 3:31 pm
5895 Views
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Wow ...you have got to be kidding me! Last year I was lucky to get 10 views a day on my blog; after my long-ish hiatus, I had 25 names in my "recently viewed" within only a few hours.
what
the
hell?
...or did I wake up in that alternate universe in which people actually find my recitation of day-to-day silliness amusing?
So anyway ...I did a housecleaning on my watched list yesterday; some hadn't had any entries in over a year (guess I can't really wonder why my watchers migrate south everytime the long dark winter of Canus creeps out). I have a few hours this morning, but then my day will be more getting hectic with doctor appointments after lunch. This time a nephrologist (I was surprised to learn that they specialize in kidneys, not Egyptian female deities); there are a lot of things up in the air right now, but renal failure is the usual endgame for my mothers condition. This will be another of the "sweat a little bit" appointments.
I recently fired Mom's urologist ...she's has been having trouble with overactive bladder (my Mom, not the Urologist), so the doctor gave her a bunch of samples of a fairly new drug. We didn't really think it was working until we ran OUT of it (the doctor had to reschedule an appointment), and for the first three days after running out ...she was worse than before she started it. I found it somewhat suspicious that after about three days, she appeared to be back to about the same frequency as when she was on it. On the next office visit, she gave us a prescription for a higher dosage of the same stuff; we figured since we hadn't really even thought the other was working at all, then she might benefit from a higher dose.
Well, there were two problems. First of all was the price ...the co-pay was nearly a hundred bucks! (to put that in perspective; the co-pay on her chemo is $60 ...the price tag for the chemo is $15,000 for 20 pills ...and yes, the one-five followed by three zero's was not a typo; pretty sure the stuff is made by distilling the sweat from hummingbird testicles) I asked the six foot super-hot Russian pharmacist chick (yes, there IS a reason I like picking up Mom's medicine for her) about the price, and she said that it was mostly just because it was a fairly new drug; luckily, she said there were plenty of less expensive alternatives.
Which brings me around to number two problem, and number two was the BIG one; within a couple of hours of taking the higher dosage, she got really sick. I was away from the house, so a co-worker brought her home ...she slept all day, and then mostly felt fine again by the next morning. I called the doctors office and spoke with the nurse, who told me to have her stop taking the medication and she would call back later after speaking with the doctor. I also asked about one of the alternatives since the co-pay was kind of ridiculous for something we hadn't originally even thought was working in the first place.
A little bit of phone-tag hijinx followed, but eventually the nurse got back in touch with me. Now this part just kills me ...nope on alternatives, not even an offer to go back to the original dosage (that I probably would have said no to). Mom drinks two cups of coffee every morning ...she used to drink more than that in the pre-cancer days, but cut way back probably in the last decade or so. The doctors orders were for her to quit drinking coffee completely and come back in two months to see how that worked.
me: ummm ...no.
her: ...excuse me?
me: I said "NO" ...I'm not going to ask my 81 year-old terminally ill cancer patient Mother to give up her morning coffee which she loves, "just to see" if makes her pee less ...not only in the morning when you would expect it, but around the clock ...it's TWO FUCKING CUPS! (Cripes ...her oncologist said if she wanted to eat ice cream three times a day, then LET her!)
her: Uhhhmm ...well, the doctor says she needs to stop with the coffee.
me: That's all good and fine for her to say that, I'm just telling you "no" ...we aren't going to do it.
her: well uhm ...okay; I guess we'll just see you again in two months then.
me: Two months?! ...Why in the world would we want to do that?!
her: for the follow-up.
me: a follow up to what?! You haven't given us anything to follow up about. I can see it if you were to give us an alternative medicine to try out, but after "well ...try quitting coffee?!" ..to which I unequivocally say "no fucking way" Either give me some realistic orders, or cancel the next appointment.
her: Well uhm ...I guess I'll talk to the doctor again then.
What's really sad is that she really DID sound like the boss in "Office Space." It's been over two weeks and I still haven't heard back. I'm not holding my breath. I'm usually a bit more diplomatic about these sorts of things, but holy shit! ...it just sounded kind of lazy to me.
The Nephrologist called yesterday and asked about the blood tests they never asked us to get ...I'm kind of hoping that we won't be paddling down that same river again. I referred her to the oncologist (who does blood tests every week), but the numbers the Nephrologist needs aren't done in the weekly tests.
We shall see. Time to get started on Mom's breakfast in any case.
later Alligators!
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non-filtered please
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Posted:Feb 12, 2014 10:46 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
5271 Views
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So as I'm wading around in the large pools of yellow stuff (the BLOGS dammit, I mean my long-neglected list of watched BLOGS!), I have noticed a trend among the elder bloggers about some sort of "Unfiltered February" that I've wandered into the midst of ...my previous post suddenly seems somewhat appropriate, even if I didn't really realize it at the time.
It might have normally been the type of post I would have taken down after an hour or so (enough time for me to ask myself if I really wanted that much information about my life out there on the interwebz), but given the "unfiltered" trend, I guess I'll let it stand.
...and hastily write another post to bump the other down on the list a little bit.
The last year and a half has given me a lot to think about. I still fight with smoking from time to time ...well, to be precise, I don't fight it from time to time. Once I was a heavy smoker, then I quit, then I started an "every now and then" thing with smoking that rears its ugly head when my lack of bad habits collides with my abundance of stress.
Last year when the steam built up, my sister and hubby took Mom for a weekend and I zoomed off on a camping trip. I bought plenty of beer (most of which is still in the refrigerator), and a pack of cigarettes. First I had smoked in well over a year ...when the camping weekend was done, I threw the remaining smokes in the last vestiges of the campfire and was done with them.
A week or so after the New Year, I bought a pack ...smoked all of them over the course of a few days; I carefully showered and washed my clothes to wipe out any vestiges of the smell and let it be my own little secret. The week before last I had bought a pack and did the same. The trend was speeding up a little bit, but I'm really not all that concerned. My brother's wife quit last year, but still does the electronic cigarette. He mentioned a while back that if I ever got the urge too strongly, then I should do the electronic ones like my SIL.
The thought crossed my mind once or twice, but then it occurred to me that an electronic cigarette would simply be inviting an addiction that I really can't/won't afford to partake in. I feel though so thoroughly disgusted after smoking even briefly, the odds on my picking it up permanently are slim to none; if made a bit TOO easy (e-cig), inviting (re)addiction is almost assured.
So yeah ...fuck that; it's all about the bad habit I think. At the moment, I'm living a puritanical lifestyle that SO doesn't agree with me ...I will give myself permission to push back a little bit when and how I can. As if the nastiest cigarettes available weren't enough to make me do a double-take, the coughing and gagging for two weeks afterward pretty well seals the deal (or the lack of a deal).
I'd probably take non-filtered there too given the opportunity.
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Preserving Modesty
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Posted:Feb 12, 2014 8:51 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:22 am
5323 Views
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It's back for a bit anyway; I'm almost tempted to change the title of my blog to the header of this post simply because it tends to be the two words nobody on this site particularly wants to hear. (Why in the world I would take such perverse glee in that, I have no idea)
I've fallen out of the bloggy thing for a while; life has had a few twisty turns thrown in of late that hasn't made me exceptionally conducive to gravitation towards creative expression. My stress level has been high for the last few months ...at a time when one might think I would NEED the outlet has been where I've shied away.
So we'll see what this next chapter will bring.
For a quick catch-up on the bullet points of my life:
-single, never married
-doesn't work, lives with his mom
-loves sci-fi and comic stuff (eg: huge nerd/geek)
-drives a car older than many of the members here
-once upon a time, was a huge computer geek but the 21st century is overtaking my ambition in that area.
Once again, I have to mention the somewhat perverse glee I take in highlighting those particular attributes. Self-depreciation is something of an art form with me, and so I have to get my yuks where I can. You gotta admit that in any case, that list is a caricature waiting to happen.
If you were to go back a ways in this very blog, you would find that once upon a time I was a happy bachelor, living in a perfectly reasonable apartment with my really rotten dog. I took pride in my lack of cooking skills and utter disregard for conventional housekeeping. I once joked about how I'd be homeless before I ever moved in with my parents again, so the present set of circumstance has made a liar out of me on so many levels I barely even know where to begin.
Single, never married Yeah, that much is true although I was in an 8-year relationship that only lacked the piece of paper. I'm kind of big on my privacy ...I didn't have much of it as a , and I'm in a position again where it's beginning to lack again.
Doesn't work True enough ...I'm disabled and on disability; no missing limbs or anything, but I never know if I'm over or understating things so I prefer to just not say anything until asked. lives with Mom Yes, but as a caregiver in the larger sense ...she has cancer, and it's starting to gain on her. I'm now a cook and housekeeper as well as chauffeur.
The rest mostly stands on its own. Old car: bought it in the early 90's, spent three years restoring it after leaving it parked for nearly 5 years (I recently gave away my other car after Mom gave up driving completely last year). Sci-fi geek: proud of it, although I don't even come close to "Big Bang Theory" level of nerd-ism.
So yeah.
It may be time to re-vamp my profile and start writing a bit again even though there isn't much chance of doing anything more than writing. I'm in a piss-poor position of knowing the only way of that changing any time soon is when my mother passes ...so best to just not go there.
So here I am again.
About Mom: 81 years old, stage 3 (possibly 4 now) cancer, up until two weeks ago she still worked part time ...about when I stopped writing the last time was about the point that she really didn't have much business working anymore, but did anyway. It was also about the point that her chemo started taking a downward turn and her mental health began to suffer.
...and then last week she fell and broke her right wrist.
Sucks for sure, but it was sort of the reason I moved in with her in the first place. The thought of that sort of thing happening with nobody around was the driving force behind the pressure for me to move in with her in the first place.
The broken arm has really mucked things up. She's now going to be forced to leave her job; my siblings and I have been trying to nudge her in that direction for a while, but now circumstances have forced ...umm, her hand. My sister comes by every other day to help her bathe ...so as I sit here and write my blog on an adult site, an active concern within my family is preserving my mothers modesty.
Oh yeah ...did I mention that my father was a Baptist minister his entire career, all three sons are atheist, but the only is an evangelical Christian to the right of Sarah Palin on the political compass?
...cue the Addams family theme music now. (and I've barely scratched the surface of all the ways we put the "fun" in "dysfunctional")
So I guess I'm here again for a while whilst I try to work through some of the "stuff" ahead. I suspect there is going to be plenty of it.
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