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In honour of Halloween...
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In honour of Halloween... MY RECOMMENDATION OF 13 SEXY HORROR FILMS (or; horror films featuring women I find hot.) Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) Werner Herzog's remake of the 1922 film (in turn an adaptation of Bram Stoker's Dracula) features the impossibly beautiful and ethereal Isabelle Adjani. Sure, we've got Klaus Kinski with rat-like fangs, a typically-brilliant Bruno Ganz as the luckless Jonathan Harker, Roland Topor as a perfectly-manic Renfield, music by Popul Vuh and beautiful Dutch and Czech location shooting, but seriously, this movie is ruled by the raven-haired, pale-skinned, wide-eyed Isabelle Adjani, who competes with The Hot Spot/Career Opportunities-era Jennifer Connelly as cinema's most perfect specimen of female beauty (in my admittedly-fevered opinion). Docteur Jekyll et les Femmes (a.k.a. The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Miss Osbourne, 1981) Typically-bonkers psychosexual freak-out from infamous Polish filmmaker Walerian Borowczyk. Udo Kier is Dr Henry Jekyll; Marina Pierro Is Jekyll's seemingly-innocent fiancee, Fanny Osbourne. When Fanny discovers her betrothed is using weird chemicals to turn himself into a murderous sexual deviant, she isn't repulsed by him. Quite the opposite. This movie is so batshit insane it's hard to adequately summarise - the weird characters, bizarre situation, and soft-focus cinematography make the whole thing as close to a fever-dream as any film I've seen. (What would be horrifying is undermined by savage<b> camp </font></b>humour: transforming into Mr Hyde, Jekyll buggers men as well as women to death with his massive phallus.) Marina Pierro is staggeringly gorgeous and alluring, especially when taking a bath in a cocktail of chemicals that transforms her into a blood-letting nymphomaniac (spoiler alert, I guess). The Howling (1981) The (sadly, now deceased) Elisabeth Brooks is the ne plus ultra of sexy female werewolves. As Marsha Quist, a vision in black leather, Brooks is implacably cruel and evil yet undeniably alluring - the sexiest thing in Joe Dante's rightfully-beloved fang-tastic horror/comedy. An American Werewolf in London (1981) One of my all-time favourite movies - it just seems more perfect every time I watch it (which is a lot). Written and directed by comedy filmmaker John Landis, American Werewolf isn't a comedy - it's not even a horror/comedy (even though it's often and carelessly described as such). It's actually a perfectly straight horror film with funny moments in it. Anyway, while American backpacker David Naughton gets maimed by a wolf, sees his best friend get mauled to death, and turns into a murderous werewolf himself before being fatally shot by police...he DID get to score with a hot nurse, played by Jenny Agutter with typically-Agutter-esque class and sensuousness. So, it all balances out, no? Cat People (1982) Question: In the early 1980s, was there a better choice for the role of innocent-waif-turned-predatory-feline-sexpot than a slinky, full-lipped, green-eyed Nastassja Kinski? Answer: No, there was not. Also, this film has an amazing David Bowie/Giorgio Moroder title song, and Ed Begley Jr. getting his arm ripped off. But if we're discussing the film in the context of sexy, it's all Nastassja, baby. The Hunger (1983) Tony Scott's flashy goth-spawning vampire softcore film pretty much falls apart after David Bowie's character gets put in a coffin halfway through, but after that we still get to see Catherine Deneuve getting it on with Susan Sarandon. The Return of the Living Dead (1985) Dan O'Bannon's punk-rockabilly horror-comedy is a goddamn classic (which we have to thank for fast, brain-eating zombies). Not a hugely-sexy film overall, but it does feature a shapely, in-her-prime Linnea Quigley discarding her clothes and dancing nude in a cemetery. Angel Heart (1987) Mickey Rourke plays scuzzy 1950s PI Harry Angel, hired by enigmatic Louis Cypher (Robert De Niro) to find missing musician Johnny Favorite. Angel goes from jazz-soaked NYC to voodoo-soaked Louisiana and gets hot and heavy in with Lisa Bonet in an infamous sex scene. The irony? For appearing in the raw in this movie, Lisa Bonet lost her gig on The Cosby Show because Bill Cosby thought the film was sleazy. Oh, the irony... Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992) The movie is a hyper-stylised piece of shit, but man is Sadie Frost hot in it. Embrace of the Vampire (1995) The movie is a hyper-moronic piece of shit, but man is Alyssa Milano hot in it. From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) Had Salma Hayek done nothing after this movie, her big-screen immortality would have been assured anyway, thanks to that snake dance. Ginger Snaps (2000) Katharine Isabelle makes a pretty ravishing werewolf, I have to say. Under the Skin (2013) OK, I'm cheating because I haven't actually watched this one yet (the DVD is still in its shrink-wrap). But since the movie stars Scarlett Johansson as a male-baiting alien seductress who gets nekkid, I'm pretty sure it would make my list. (What, is it like the movie Species only, y'know, GOOD?) |
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Good choice list!!!   WITHOUT PASSION LIFE IS NOTHING
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