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| Blogs > rm_debluvz2fck > Another Whisper In The Dark |
Tongue Best Leashed (or I Kept Mine... Somewhat)
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Tongue Best Leashed (or I Kept Mine... Somewhat) Oh, how the poppets will jump out and demand my attention. My first response is sometimes a little more blunt than most would appreciate. It is often long-winded, too. The young man who attracted my attention this time receive the second (kinder, gentler) version of the response I have provided below. But I will give a synopsis version his blog posting first. “I'm not good at picking up women in person, so I thought I'd try to get them online. Affairlook and websites like it are a scam. They take your money. I only got two messages in a month and paid forty dollars. It isn't worth it. I got like ten messages from couples right after my one month gold membership had expired. Scam! Don't fall for the lies. You won't get laid. I didn't.” My initial response went as follows. I'll offer a suggestion or two. I hope you don't mind. If I lived in Ohio, I know you wouldn't be interested in me. This is purely an offer of assistance. Your profile offers a good deal of information in a manner much similar to the way you wrote this blog posting. Very random in its direction though offering a lot of information, it doesn't help with soliciting interest. A well written profile will attract more attention than one you cobble together in the time it takes you to type your message. The difference in numbers between women and men make it a game where women have the upper hand here. Your searching for a woman who is in great shape and works out further limits your odds. You are free to be selective, but put in the effort to find those women's attention. You haven't as of yet. I would add that you should not choose a few extra pounds as your body type. While you might firmly be of the mind that you could stand to lose five or ten pounds, you are (according to your picture, at least) either slim, athletic or average in your build. Think of average as what is typical for an American (as you live here) rather than an ideal body weight according to doctors. A few extra pounds, then, refers to someone who could stand to lose twenty or more. That isn't you. And the gold membership gives you the ability to contact other people after reading their profiles and gauging whether you could be compatible. It isn't paying for sex. I'm sure that there are other sites for that, but this is for people who are looking for something of a sexual nature that most people make perfectly clear in their profiles when it isn't sex with someone who interests them. Spend the time looking at profiles that the site determines to be compatible with you, read what the women have to say, and, in that small margin where you are what they are looking for, address where you believe you will fill their needs in your introductory message after telling a little about yourself. Women can be overwhelmed and may not respond to messages that are simply a hi or show nothing of why they should give you a second glance. And, if you're horrible at approaching women at bars or anywhere else, why would you believe that the anonymity of a website would suddenly make you suddenly irresistible? Of course paying for a one month gold membership will resolve all of your issues of shyness and hesitation. It works for everyone else, now, doesn't it? That wasn't terribly kind, though. And I found that it went a good deal longer than the blogger's own posting. That isn't good etiquette, either. What I went with instead follows. I'd make a few suggestions for you, if you don't mind. First, re-write your profile. Like your blog post, it is long and rambling. Ask someone you know to help you with the edit. There is good information, but it is a difficult read. Second, your choice of body type as a few extra pounds isn't doing you any favors. Based on your picture, you are anywhere from lean to average, possibly athletic. Women may dismiss you based on choosing the wrong type. Third, paying forty dollars to any website isn't going to cure your personal shortcomings. Don't take this the wrong way, but being "horrible at picking up girls at bars or any where else" doesn't magically disappear when you are behind a keyboard. What the website offers you for the price of gold membership is the opportunity to read members' profiles and send emails that are crafted to attract their attention. If you don't carefully read the profiles and respond with a message that will set you apart from all of the other men who contact women on this site, something that shows that you not only have access to her profile but also took the time to read it, they won't respond. That is where gold membership sets the members apart, with the ability to read what the women have to say and explain where you should be chosen. Finally, you get what you put into this site. Make an effort to talk to other people. Ask for suggestions on how you could improve your presentation. Say more than why am I not getting laid? I paid forty dollars! It isn't a scam because you didn't get laid. It simply laid opportunities at your feet that you were either unwilling or unable to accept. Or you had unreasonable expectation. Six of one, half dozen of another. Good luck to you. You don't seem to be an delusional man, just a little confused about what a website can offer. Of course, his choice of screen names brought up thoughts of the last turkey in the butcher shop. That isn't likely to inspire confidence in a woman. But I didn't go there. The man simply didn't know when to leave well enough alone. Posting a complaint about this site being a scam because he wasn't getting lucky wasn't going to change his chances. I don't know if my comment will help him. He may just need to meet an incredibly shy girl through a friend, get married, and settle down. Looking for sex partners isn't for the meek, after all. I may not be sweet, but I'd grow great azaleas! |
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