Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
Blogs > OneStrangeBeast > The Beast Burrow |
Safety precautions for women - Edition
Safety precautions for women - Edition I don't normally go in for cutting and pasting things I didn't write or draw myself, but this deserves to be shared. I couldn't have done it better myself. |
||||
|
Flip Side: Atomic Mass: varies highly {all the way from lump somewhere to good gawd get out of my way don't you have something else to do} Physical Properties: Body surface normally covered with various densities of hair {if not, please see stats on "androgynous" or "gay" or "metrosexual"} Can boil for no reason {see "jealousy" or "alpha male"}; can freeze for no reason {see "male: not paying attention" or "jealousy"} Found in various grades, from virgin material, common ore, 'everyday' grade, to the type that can be 'changed' from iron to gold Chemical Properties: Reacts well with electronic uses, fast cars, loose females, sports, and alcoholic beverages {without umbrellas or fruit} Has been known to explode spontaneously for no reason {see: electronics, fast cars, loose females, sports, alcoholic beverages, and in-laws when 'activated'} Common Use: opening stuck jars, yardwork, wearing out loungers/sofas, providing body heat, providing examples of bad examples to offspring, providing the occasional orgasm, providing continual amazement/consternation/amusement Hazards: Has extremely bad gaseous state{s}, but overall usually advisable to have several as any single one does not seem to be all that is required for various reasons
| |||
|
OSHA doesn't approve of the phrase "bite me, big boy" either, what was your point?
|
Become a member to create a blog