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Men Behaving Badly - A Poll For the Ladies
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Men Behaving Badly - A Poll For the Ladies |
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Ryan, this is posted twice, although this one has more choices. PERSONALLY, I think it is not really fair to have us narrow it down to just ONE of these. I think their behavior on the IMC is just as bad as the behavior in the emails. Some invite just to see pics and again don't read profiles. And yes, I am aware that some women do this also. Personally, I chose the emails section as I could ONLY choose one.
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I think top would be on IM paging on here if using it. Sometime, when just turn on the webcam or even no webcam on just using the IM,one would read some of those not nice messages. But since, I don't use it that much as don't have much time, I should say email.
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They really should get an e-mail from the site once their profile is created. Maybe even write one up for each type of profile and mail one out to everyone if not one all encompassing "suggestion" for getting the most out of a membership.
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While this is a good idea I fear any FAQ will be read as much profiles are actually read: i.e. rarely and only by those who have their heads already screwed on straight. To be honest I think most of the rude comments, the whole “since you’re on Affairlook you are here to service me” tacky comments is from men who are that way in real life, the internet just allows them to be even more brash. So will a FAQ be of beneficial help to those, probably not but it cannot hurt either. For the location: yes some emails are just crass funny how some men think females wait 24/7 just to be summoned to a strange man’s hotel room to give him a blow job that day. Chat rooms are just as bad, I gave up even going there anymore because the men just want a sex show, any erotic talk is a joke. IM’s also a dead zone anymore; the majority want you to perform for them on cam and when you say no you are called all sort of "wonderful" names. Personally I do not do the cams but I have heard some viewers are very rude and demanding. So where to place the aforementioned FAQ’s: more than one spot may be the best bet.  [post 2834794] [post 2827268] Battle Phantoms.....When the Sun Weeps....Life Revisited a poem [post 2625633].....Pygmalions Moonlight Sonata....[post 2625650] [post 2622197].... [post 2344308]
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That is EXACTLY what I am talking about. That 'to me' sounds more like a than a sexual encounter. Someone MAY like that, but they send that crap to people without reading anything and think we all like it. IF anyone wants to see more of this type of stuff, the types of messages we get when we say no, and of course messages that are sent just because our profile says we are not interested in what we want .. please go read these... #1...Emailslame, boring, or just plain stupidwupdates #2...A polite No Thank You can cause thiswupdates #3...Unsolicited HATE Emails no prior contactwupdates They are not all my messages, MANY people have posted. I personally wouldn't want ANY man 'ramming his dick' up my butt with no warning.. thanks for that posting.
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10/14/2009 12:14 pm |
THE MOST IMPORTANT, IS USE THE EMAL!!!
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Ryan, the sad truth is that while the examples that emeritebelle showed you are common, they are not the worst of what the women get. There aren't too many women here that haven't gotten these types of messages at one point or another. If they were rare, do you think the majority of us would get so upset about them? We get these types {and worse} as first contact e-mails. We get them if we politely decline someone. We get them if we don't reply to someone. We get them if they send a decent first e-mail and we agree to further communication, even when we don't say anything that leads up to these types of responses. In short, we get them because we exist. It makes no difference what we write or don't write in our profiles, groups, blogs or anywhere else. Now, we realize the site can't be held responsible for the actions and attitudes of men/women like this joining this site, but when the site actually does something to promote this attitude, we take issue with it. The "Get Laid Tonight" and the "You Will Get Laid ~ Guaranteed" ad campaigns will draw in the customers, but it solidifies those who believe the very distinct message it sends out and possibly creates a pre-set attitude for those that may not have been so inclined otherwise. There is an expectation put in place by these ads that is designed to disrespect and insult the members who did nothing more than join this site themselves, for whatever reason they choose to be here. While you give us the tools to block other members, it doesn't stop the multitudes that follow. Nor does it erase what we had to deal with in the first place. You cannot un-ring that bell. From this type of behavior, women and men will get frustrated at not being able to escape this. Wherever they are on site, they will get this. They will tire of it and leave. More will create a suspicious attitude and in a place where the written word is crucial, many things will be taken the wrong way first before the benefit of the doubt is given. Some may get totally cynical and perpetuate further bad behavior and express it to others. The folks that are here to simply blog, bling, chat or join groups may not feel as affected because they may simply ignore and delete these types of e-mails and postings. Those that have similar attitudes that it's just sex and the person is of no consequence probably won't care and take it in stride. However, those who have a sincere wish to meet people for friendship, dating, connecting with like-minded people for sexual encounters on any level and those wanting long term relationships do care about how they are interacted with by strangers and expect a modicum of decent adult behavior. Could you possibly imagine if I had this crass attitude and I walked into your office and demanded you strip and perform sexual acts of my choosing in the most vulgar of words and had never spoken to you before that moment? Ok, so at best, you are able to put me out of your office, but wait! There's a hundred more men and women lined up outside your door and each one will randomly walk into your office and do the very same thing. So you put up a sign on your door explaining why you are here. They don't bother reading it and continue to hound and harass you. Wouldn't you eventually tire of it and ask that your boss do something? Then, as you leave the office for the day, you notice a sign on the front door saying "Enter here and get laid ~ guaranteed!" The sign doesn't specifically state your name as a participant to this, but wouldn't the assumption of anyone reading that sign think everyone within the confines of that building are fair game for the offer? What the site should be doing, instead of promoting this attitude is advertise to the freedom and openness of adult interaction that this site is truly good for. Let them know they can leave their repressions at the door and be welcome to seek whatever it is they might be lacking in their lives or just come in and have some fun. With so many members, there is something here for everyone, if they just take the time to look around and see, talk and utilize the many features this site has created. The marketing should be geared not just towards the men, but the women as well. They need to stop thinking that we have to be bombarded with non-stop sexual photos or videos and prodding adverts to open up and have fun. It's already obvious that there is sexual freedom within the confines of these walls. Do they really need to push that so blatantly each and every day and foster the belief that we are nothing more than the sum of our body parts to be used and discarded like yesterdays newspaper? You have heard many voices when people are upset about why they would discontinue a paying membership or why they would never pay in the first place. How about asking those that do pay and continue to pay, why they stay and why they continue to pay? Promote the positives because there really are a lot of positives to this place.
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I saw this today, and it JUST backs up my thoughts on the kind of messages this ad will start. **Some women don't understand what this site is about...not getting married, getting laid! Get it girls** It may be about getting laid, but the 'get it oirls' part is offensive to me. This man was 66 not a kid, and he is married. I personally would NOT do a man like this for age and status, some may. But to assume as we are here we need to 'get it girls' and start having sex. I wrote him back and said that if I had sex with every message I had, that would be like 100 men in one day. NOT gonna happen. Someone HAS to be told no. Now cut that to 1/4 of it. I am still NOT having sex with 25 men in ONE day...NOT GONNA HAPPEN someone HAS to be told NO. This ad only makes some men truly believe that the site is ABOUT SEX and nothing else. You sign in and have mindless sex with guys contacting us and OUR preferences mean nothing "get it on girls..the site is about sex". THIS is the mentality I can do without!! That sounds so condescending to me. Kinda like "you are here to f*ck.. GET IT??"
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I like your idea. We've been tossing around the idea of rating interactions. To some level, kudos does that - but it's not a great system. Thanks for the ideas. Good stuff. A rating system that allows members to rate another, that is just asking for trouble. Whereas it sounds like a good idea on the surface underneath that is a pot just waiting to explode: unfortunately there are always a few that have to abuse the system. All one has to do to see this play in action is to look at the Advice Line on how MRR list was abused and the continuing swamping of negative votes to openly harass people they do not like. Another example is the targeting of pictures with negative votes to get even with the person. I know personally I do not want to be rated negative because I will not have sex with every turkey out there, and that is what will happen. Is that fair? It is my body and MY choice to say no and I should not be penalized for that or have to fight some idiot black-marking me because of my choice. I would like to urge Affairlook to seriously look at the possible consequences of "interaction ratings" and how it can be abused by angry members. [post 2834794] [post 2827268] Battle Phantoms.....When the Sun Weeps....Life Revisited a poem [post 2625633].....Pygmalions Moonlight Sonata....[post 2625650] [post 2622197].... [post 2344308]
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hey you can't blame the men you advertise this site "join today get laid tonight" so with a invitation like that of course there are some emails that really should be directed to your people who decide who to advertise and promote the site...as for the hate emails i get from men in their 50's well again Affairlook fault you advertise me on senior sizzle when i am NOT looking for a senior so its not the men its you guys    je ne regrette rien
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10/17/2009 6:53 am |
ryan- iam a stander member and writting a email no trouble there but sending it out now there becomes the trouble being a stander dont know how to sent it from a to B same as net work friends but onces they answer me back then its ok to invite them to my friends list . great thread u got going here alot of sugguestions going around kudus i got them but dont know what u even use them for another topic another time lost ,,,thanks    
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Geez,....... I withdraw my suggestion. And I guess I won't bother making any others, either. Golly, that'll teach me to try to be helpful, huh? I knew I should have stuck to my own blog,... No, not every suggestion will work, but it may lead to new suggestions that might. They get our creative juices flowing. 
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There is already a defacto "rating system" in place...which is horribly abused...not only the kudos which were taken away from standards but voting on photos and videos...even the voting on the blogs and the advice lines have been abused...although your prime customer is male...you seriously need to look at your marketing practices...to encourage females to be here...otherwise this will rapidly become a ghost site...
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you know...its not just the men. sigh a lot of women im ..."how long is it" let me see it...... can my husband suck it...... will you come over with your son........ and i could go on and on......nevermind someof what ive seen on web cams..... lets just say i never liked dogs in bed to begin with  there are a LOT of women here also who could use a little advising. no matter where you go....... there you are.
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I really didn't know what to pick since clueless people show up everywhere on the site. I think the highest volume of clueless guys showed up in the chatroom of a group I belong to. The group rules clearly state that no cyber sex or webcams are allowed in the chatroom. For a while this spring, there was a site glitch that made all interest group chatrooms visible on the list of most active chatrooms. We literally had hundreds of guys coming into the room with their cams on, soliciting the women to watch them cumming. If you're going to have a message to site members to try to be more polite, you really should put it everywhere, not just email.
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Sorry, GhostofAxe, nothing personal, but I have to disagree with your suggestion, too. Obviously, it would nice to have a way to identify the genuine losers. However, if we had a rating system like what you suggest, every time a person turned someone down, that person who was rejected would turn around and give the person who rejected him/her a bad rating. I personally like the Kudos system. It basically works on the principle of "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything."
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I don't want to say this wrong and or hurt feeling but- I believe its how things are worded!! How they start their message's!! Now I know no-one is perfect, and its hard for a lot of people to put in words what they want to say. My husband hates e-mailing and blogging. He's 6'9 has large hands and fingers. HE HATES THE KEYBOARD! Maybe if they had sample 's or help like they do when your doing your profile!!?? Just a thought! Cat
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11/3/2009 11:37 pm |
we are a married couple and get a lot of emails from single men .99%of which we read and then bin .men need to start selling themselves and not their cock
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11/11/2009 6:32 pm |
I personally never look at ratings as they are usually biased and I don't need someone else opinion on what my opinion will be about someone... that's how my home city is- everyone has an opinion about everybody without even getting to know them.... very shallow- if you don't like what you see, just move on... that's my opinion
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