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Get Up Offa That Thing
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Get Up Offa That Thing Sometimes people say of someone they're lusting after "I wouldn't kick them out of bed for eating crackers ." I want to make one thing perfectly clearly to everyone - I don't care who are you , if you eat crackers in bed you are a disgusting animal . I believe at this point I have collected enough information to declare with some measure of confidence that I am "weird" for wearing underwear with pajama pants . The first time someone was rooting around down there (if you know what I mean) and they said "are you wearing underwear ?" I thought they were the weird one because why wouldn't I be ? But I have enough data now to conclude that , as per usual , I am in the minority on this one . My question to you fine people though is why ? I mean you have underwear on , you take off your non-sleep pants to put on other pants why do you think "I should take off my underwear also" ? What's the thought process ? What's the benefit ? The worldwide use of pajamas is the result of adoption by British colonists in India in the 18th and 19th centuries and the British influence on the wider Western world during the Victorian era . In January 2012 Michael Williams , a commissioner in Caddo Parish , LA , proposed an ordinance prohibiting people from wearing pajamas in public . Williams pushed for a law against pajama pants after seeing a group of young men wearing loose-fitting pajama pants that were about to show their private parts . According to Williams "The moral fiber in our community is dwindling . If not now , when ? Because it's pajama pants today , next it will be underwear tomorrow ." Underwear Tomorrow would be a pretty good name . Not as good as Scam Likely , but good .  Sometimes on the movies and the TV you see a couple both brushing their teeth at the same time . This is insane . Ever never lived with someone in that capacity so I don't know but I cannot believe this really happens in really real life . Because why would it ? Why wouldn't you just wait 90 seconds and brush your teeth afterwards ? If your schedule is that tight you need to loosen things up a little bub . The other day a couple was saying they feel all they do is watch Netflix and they wanted some ideas on other things do to and someone else went on a rant about how everyone is addicted to their screens these days and they need to get out and do stuff but when pressed about what "stuff" to do the person ranted admitted pretty much all they do is watch Netflix . I'm not sure if this was a brilliant comedy bit or a very sad real moment - possible both . There's a disturbing number of articles out there about what to do when you have no friends besides binge-watch Blossom season 4 . Life is hard (actually our lives are super easy but people don't like hearing that) . And Netflix provides a needed respite . But let me ax you a question . How often are you choosing Netflix over something else ? While I was reading about this I came across an article about the best TV couples of all time - most of which were from the past 20 years , I guess there were no good TV couples before 2000 . Admitting of course that the entire topic is extremely silly to begin with I have a complaint . Leonard and Penny were on list . WRONG . They are a terrible couple . I haven't watched the show in a few years but I doubt things got better . The awkward nerd finally scoring the beautiful blonde is a well worn trope on account of a big portion of the audience is awkward losers who want to bang hot ladies (and yet there's very rarely a situation where the loser girl scores the hot dude) but there is on-screen no chemistry between Penny and Leonard (possibly because they banged in real life according to the Joey theory) . The main , possibly only reason , Penny goes for Leonard is because he already loves her . The end . She decides to be with Leonard less out of love and more out of convenience . It's clearly evident that Leonard will do anything for Penny which she knows and takes full advantage of . There's no balance . I swear to you people that in one episode back in the day Penny suggests that it is Leonard's sole purpose to make her happy , and the crowd (or crowd noise effect" goes "aww" like that's a GOOD thing . That is HORRIBLE . You know what else is horrible ? The 1983 Dan Ackroyd picture Dr. Detroit . It is truly dreadful EVEN but 1983 standards which as you know is saying something . Here's a quick summary - "While Clifford is teaching classes, grading papers, catering a faculty party and assisting in hosting the visiting CEO, his Doctor Detroit alter ego has to find a way to get Thelma out of a solicitation charge and appear at the Players Ball to be proclaimed the new King of the Pimps while simultaneously appearing at Monroe College's annual Alumni Dinner." That's pure 80s right there . That not withstanding if you're anything like me (which you aren't) you've been wondering all these years what happened to the women who played Dr. Detroit's hos . I mean Fran Drescher achieved enough popularity later on that you more of less know her deal but what about the lessor known ho-actresses ? Donna Dixon who played ho-Monica married Dan Ackroyd after the shooting of this terrible terrible movie and went on to star , no not star 'be' , in some other terrible Dan Aykroyd movies . Lynn Whitfield who played who played ho-Thelma starred in a lady doctor show called HeartBeat with Kate "Captain Janeway" Mulgrew . She played the titular role in The Josephine Baker Story which won a bunch of awards but more importantly for a 14 year old me in which she appeared 100% nude . Later she would appear in critically acclaimed independent drama Eve's Bayou . Later still she appeared in a bunch of terrible movies . But she's still working you know ? And I wouldn't mind seeing her naked today . Which is surely the highest honor a woman can achieve . Lydia Li who played ho-Jasmine had a reoccurring role and then disappeared mysteriously . Although is there any other way to disappear ? I suppose not . If you know where Lydia Li is let me know . Unless you killed her because that seems like a whole situation that I don't know how to deal with . That could be an interesting movie plot - out of the blue Joe Everyman gets a call from someone claiming that he murdered a mildly<b> famous </font></b>actress from the 90's and starts giving little details that seem to be true about it . Because what's Joe going to do ? He goes to the police but they're convinced it's a crank call scenario . But he can't do nothing right ? The calls continue to come in and they weigh on his conscious . So he tries to investigate himself but really what can he do ? He's just a shift supervisor at FedEx what does he know about solving a crime . That's a decent first act but I don't know where to go from there , or what the shocking reveal would be at the end where you find out why the murderer decided to call Joe in the first place . Also no one calls anyone these days . Did you know what Lara Flynn Boyle is from Iowa ? I didn't . I suppose that dispels the idea of Midwesterners being chunky . I don't remember her being in Wayne's World either , but she was . Her most recent film was Black Forest: Hansel and Gretel and the 420 Witch aka Hansel and Gretel Get Baked alongside Cary Elwes . I don't even know what to think about that . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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Cause I'm on the scene , like a sex machine Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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People don't wear underwear underneath their pajama pants because it's nice to let things air out a bit and it's more comfortable for sleeping to just have one layer down there and not be experiencing the constriction of underwear elastic. To me, the wearing of underwear can be for the following reasons: -your pants or jeans won't have to be washed as often because the underwear protects them from your crotch stank -some pants, like jeans, would be harsh on your tender bits and the underwear is a barrier against that -the old "what if you get hit by a bus" argument None of those reasons really apply when you're wearing Ince comfy pajama pants in bed. Unless you never want to launder your pajama pants.   
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Also, I guess I'm a disgusting animal.
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I never watch Netflix and I know all sorts of stuff to do instead so send those Netflix losers my way - next time. Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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