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Some light reading I came across
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Some light reading I came across Just before my accident and leaving Toronto, I had made a few acquaintances and contacts. Hoping back into how I was back then, I decided to start looking up a few of them. Looking up one one couple in particular, I came across the essential "How To" on social sites her and her man wrote on her blog a while back on another swing site. Upon reading it, I felt there was a lot of common sense contained in their words and feel it would not be a bad idea to pass along. Now while I may personally practice much of this, these are not my words, and the credit truly belongs to 2 others from Montreal. Read, enjoy, and pass along, especially to those just getting their feet wet: Meeting people can be fun. It’s great to broaden one's horizons and embrace others around us in helping to achieve a more fulfilling existence. Online meeting has given us this capability from the comfort of our own armchairs, but just because you’re searching from the living room, don’t let your common sense and instincts lessen when making your decisions. Online Tip #1 "Allow me to introduce myself" - This is the most common form of introduction. It’s polite, it’s confident and it’s the icebreaker that takes you to the next phase of your conversation. But think for a minute. When you introduce yourself to someone in a bar, do you say, “Hi, My name is Nicky, I live at (your address), my telephone number is (your phone number), I work at (your work address) and my e-mail address is (your e-mail address)?" No, so when introducing yourself on line, make sure you use the same common sense practice. Do not allow anyone to pressure you into revealing details before you are ready. Online Tip #2 Be truthful. Honesty is admired much more than dishonesty. Tell people what your intentions are and you’ll be starting on the correct path. But remember, common sense applies here so always assess who you are being honest with. Be polite. If you are looking for sexual encounters, say “I’m looking for a friend with the possibility to go further”, instead of “I’m looking for a good f&^k”. Online Tip #3 Have you ever been in a situation where you have spoken to someone on the phone and the persons voice creates an image of what they look like in your own mind? We bet you that if you ever met that person they would look nothing like that image you’d have created. Because very few of us are psychic we suggest you ask to see a photograph so you can feel more comfortable with whom you have contacted or who has contacted you. Remember, "a picture may paint a thousand words, but a thousand words does not necessarily paint the right picture." A full body photo is best and also a close up. Witness note: Regarding close ups. A smiling face picture is so much more appealing than a close up of your genitals. Just saying. Online Tip #4 When you choose to meet your contact do it in a mutually agreed upon public place where there are plenty of people. Advise a friend of where you are going and leave them a contact number. Provide your own transportation, when the date is over, leave on your own as well. If you should both agree to go to another location, use your own transportation. In the initial stages this is always a good idea, since it's best to act on the side of caution. Your date should be making you feel comfortable with the arrangements. Remember, the venue for your day or night out is a two-sided decision, so anything that is being arranged, you must both be happy with it. Online Tip #5 I have just won the lottery, but for me to get my money I need $10,000. If you give me that, I will give you $20,000 back”. STOP! Scam artists exist in this world. It’s a fact of life. Because they sometimes get away with scams they will continue to exist. Beware of scam artists with sob stories. NEVER give out any of your banking information or credit card information. Beware of anyone that asks you to send them money through Western Union or any other way as an upfront gift, unless you have already met this person and know who they are. Even then, use your own best judgment. Remember, scam artists can work you for a month or so to win your confidence and trust. So NEVER send anyone any money no matter how sick anyone claims their grandmother is or how badly their car needs repairs! Please use your common sense when seeing cash requests. If you get a request you are unsure of, ask a respectable friend for advice. Remember the saying, "there is no such thing as a free lunch". Online Tip #6 Remember that common sense and good judgment get you through life on a smoother road. Don’t let your dreams and desires override this one attribute we all have. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Never be forced, tempted, or controlled into any situation where you are not comfortable. Life is for living. Enjoy it to it's fullest, but be safe and smart while you are doing this. Online Tip #7 Most sites do encourage feedback from their members, both positive and negative. Report to any sites if anyone that you may feel is abusive or harmful to yourself or any other member. When a member gives false information, it is taken seriously. Untoward and dishonest behavior will NOT be tolerated on most sites. Tell them about it. That's why they are there. But, don’t forget to post good comments about folks as well. They mean just as much as bad comments, sometimes even more. When posting comments about people, always keep your preferences out of it. “They didn't bring me flowers” is a personal preference. “They told me they would bring me flowers, and then didn't” is not. Online Tip #8 Most women have every Tom, Dick, and Harry competing for their attention. If you want to move up on their list, be courteous and remind them in a sentence or two how they know you, “Hi, this is Joe from ALN. We talked the other night about different kinds of clubs in Montreal and I was wondering...” Sending a “Hi, remember me, I’m the guy with the big dick” will get you moved to the bottom of the list. A man who brags is considered a jerk in most female circles. A man that can talk intelligently and articulately moves up. Online Tip #9 Learn when to abbreviate and when not to. When text messaging, “ur” is fine, but in an email, don’t write “Ur the 1 4 me”. Learn the difference between “your and you’re”, “their or there” or “two, to, and too”. With “txt msgs” you have to be short. An email is where you can display that you are intelligent. Online Tip #10 This tip applies to everything in the online world (open chats, emails, blogs, forums, etc). If you can’t say something nice about someone, then say it privately. If you say it publicly, the intent of the forum post changes to hate message, the chat turns into a fight between “them and us”, the blogs become public bashing places, etc. Don’t stoop to their level. Online Tip #11 Most importantly, remember that no two people are the same. You may not agree with what Joe or Sally are saying, but who died and made you G-d. Do you like it when a religious group comes to your door and tells you that you are living your life wrong? No, so don’t tell Joe or Sally that they are living their lives wrong. Talk to Joe or Sally and find out why they think the way they do. I have found that one of two things happens when you do this; you get a better idea of why they think the way they do, or you find out that you misinterpreted what they said. Online Tip #12 If you are going to post something that includes someone else, do not refer to them by name. Say, “a friend of mine told me…” instead of “Joe told me…” You don’t have the right to speak for Joe. Most online sites want your online meeting experiences to be as enjoyable as possible. Sometimes it is necessary to point out certain guidelines to ensure the safety of the members. If you as a member feel they have left anything out that could be of benefit to any of the other members of the site you are on, please do not hesitate to contact the administration. Thank you for reading this. I wish all of you an enjoyable online meeting experience. For now, this is a good start. I will be posting some of my own personally experienced preferences in the near future. Hopefully not only will this serve as a "Play Safe" for the true newbie, but also encourage some of those not so new, unsure about actually contacting/meeting others, to serve as a guide to actually taking the proverbial plunge. Have Fun! |
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1/12/2010 1:50 am |
Freakin excellent post Witness hun! I have LIVED and PLAYED by a lot of these "rules" and they can never be voiced too often!! Great job! 
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Freakin excellent post Witness hun! I have LIVED and PLAYED by a lot of these "rules" and they can never be voiced too often!! Great job!
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I liked it when I ran across it too MAxi....although it's already like 3 years old now, still applies.
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